I feel a lot better today (sleep + food + you guys's niceness + more compliments on my RPing, including from two people who I look up to quite a bit), even though my advisor hasn't emailed me back yet. Also I have some really amazing friends who I talked to today about some of my insecurities about my parents and future and such (it's kind of a strange coincidence -- we met through fandom, but we all have emotionally abusive parents, so when we're not having side-splitting shenanigans, we're an accidental support group for each other) and they killed my daily burst of despair so I'm extra-good now.

I'm sure I'll be anxious all over again soon, as my good moods never last much longer than whatever's causing them, and I'm an ambivert so I can't stay in that chat room forever, but I'm better. Thanks, all of you. When I'm that upset, it doesn't matter who listens and is nice to me -- strangers, friends, even authorities -- just as long as it happens immediately.