My mother is a recovering alcoholic and it took me a long time to learn, as her adult child, that what she did, her OWN decisions, were not my responsibility. I'm quite certain that you giving her a ride was not her only option. It NEVER EVER is. And blaming youself is only a path to undeserved self-hate. Do not listen to anyone who will try to tell you it is your fault. If she expected someone to drop everything for her because she was too drunk to drive, that is not that "someone"'s problem. Please, God, by all means, mourn. But don't beat yourself up over a wrong decision that someone else made.
I turned my own mother down for rides home from the bar before. For various reasons. And I worried. But now I know that that was okay. If she really wanted to be sure she'd have a lift, she would have made arrangements in advance.
Re: 22
My mother is a recovering alcoholic and it took me a long time to learn, as her adult child, that what she did, her OWN decisions, were not my responsibility. I'm quite certain that you giving her a ride was not her only option. It NEVER EVER is. And blaming youself is only a path to undeserved self-hate. Do not listen to anyone who will try to tell you it is your fault. If she expected someone to drop everything for her because she was too drunk to drive, that is not that "someone"'s problem. Please, God, by all means, mourn. But don't beat yourself up over a wrong decision that someone else made.
I turned my own mother down for rides home from the bar before. For various reasons. And I worried. But now I know that that was okay. If she really wanted to be sure she'd have a lift, she would have made arrangements in advance.
God bless you.