OP, that's really one of the series' strong points, isn't it? Both Natsume's fears and nervousness feel so uncomfortably relatable.

Anyway, I know that I don't know anything about your life and the things you're going through, but please know that everyone (including me) feels like this at some point in their lives and I hope you all the best! Maybe we can both slowly learn how to open up to other people, like Natsume has. ;___;