It's less about subtlety and more about purpose. Everything in a narrative should serve to move the story forward (or further understanding). If there's a significant death, it should mean something and not exist solely to tug at the heartstrings.

Like I'm watching an anime right now where every other episode is full of heart-wrentching situations, but they serve a purpose, juxtaposing the protagonist's ideals against the harsh reality he lives in, or else explaining the motives of other characters. On the other hand, I was reading a webcomic that introduced an orphaned child character specifically to play up on the fact that she was an orphaned child and was also special (powers-wise; she could do things she shouldn't have been able to), and it felt too forced, like the author wanted me to care more about her and her well-being and story than the rest of the main cast. She didn't serve any other purpose than to bait my emotions, and I ended up annoyed. They're both manipulative, sure, but the first serves a purpose beyond getting me emotionally invested, whereas the second is there for just that only, and ends up feeling grossly superfluous when the bait isn't taken.