1 - Snape genuinely though that becoming a DE would impress Lily. This is easily backed up by canon and bits found in DH. He thought becoming someone important (as the DEs had promised him he would be) would make her think better of him. Unfortunately, he was wrong. So, I don't think he thought of the choice as DE vs. Lily. He thought once he was a DE, then he would be important, and therefore become more important to her. JKR said this in several post-DH interviews.
2 - I disagree with the clinging comment. I think he did cling to Lily. He wanted her to like everything he did, not necessarily because he liked it, but because it made him look more powerful and important in her eyes. He built his world around her. (Not really a good thing to do.)
Which leads to the third point...
3 - When she picked James over him, he flipped out. Like so many, he wanted revenge, especially when she chose the one guy that made his life so much harder at school. It was a sort of betrayal to him. I'm no saying Lily was wrong in picking James. I'm just saying that it hurt him deeply. He was working so hard to earn her approval (in all the wrong ways, mind you) that her rejection of that lifestyle cut him to the bone.
4 - Of course he was trying to survive. The Wizarding World was in turmoil at the time. Voldemort was on the rise. He had fallen in with a bad crowd. And just like a gang, it's hard to get out once you're in. I imagine the DE would be the same way. Once you've taken the mark, you're stuck. The mark was a mistake of huge proportions, but it was a mistake nonetheless.
5 - As for Harry, I maintain that part of his overt hatred of Harry was for show. However, I'm sure he retained a deep dislike of Harry because he was James' song. Snape was a petty person. And I think a great deal of that pettiness stemmed from his childhood.
6 - And about caring for the death of a child... Of course he didn't. He's in a bind. The one person who has shown him true kindness is in jeopardy. He doesn't think he can save everyone, but he might be able to save her. Is it noble or brave? Hell no. Is it realistic for a man with the emotional IQ of a ten year old to grasp at that straw? Of course. I'm not saying he loved Lily unconditionally. I'm not saying it was romantic or beautiful. I'm just saying that I don't think he was quite the asshole that you're making him out to be when one looks back and takes his entire life into account.
Re: 22
2 - I disagree with the clinging comment. I think he did cling to Lily. He wanted her to like everything he did, not necessarily because he liked it, but because it made him look more powerful and important in her eyes. He built his world around her. (Not really a good thing to do.)
Which leads to the third point...
3 - When she picked James over him, he flipped out. Like so many, he wanted revenge, especially when she chose the one guy that made his life so much harder at school. It was a sort of betrayal to him. I'm no saying Lily was wrong in picking James. I'm just saying that it hurt him deeply. He was working so hard to earn her approval (in all the wrong ways, mind you) that her rejection of that lifestyle cut him to the bone.
4 - Of course he was trying to survive. The Wizarding World was in turmoil at the time. Voldemort was on the rise. He had fallen in with a bad crowd. And just like a gang, it's hard to get out once you're in. I imagine the DE would be the same way. Once you've taken the mark, you're stuck. The mark was a mistake of huge proportions, but it was a mistake nonetheless.
5 - As for Harry, I maintain that part of his overt hatred of Harry was for show. However, I'm sure he retained a deep dislike of Harry because he was James' song. Snape was a petty person. And I think a great deal of that pettiness stemmed from his childhood.
6 - And about caring for the death of a child... Of course he didn't. He's in a bind. The one person who has shown him true kindness is in jeopardy. He doesn't think he can save everyone, but he might be able to save her. Is it noble or brave? Hell no. Is it realistic for a man with the emotional IQ of a ten year old to grasp at that straw? Of course. I'm not saying he loved Lily unconditionally. I'm not saying it was romantic or beautiful. I'm just saying that I don't think he was quite the asshole that you're making him out to be when one looks back and takes his entire life into account.