fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2670 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2670 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Dan Vs.]

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03.

[Mysterious Cities Of Gold]

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04.

[Sherlock]

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05.

[Drazen Bratulic]

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06.

[Captain America]

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07.

[Smash]

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08.

[El Goonish Shive]

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09.

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10. http://i59.tinypic.com/2eebuv6.jpg
[porn, Frozen, illustrated]

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11. [SPOILERS for Shameless US]

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12. [WARNING for suicide]

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13. [WARNING for rape]

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14. [WARNING for domestic violence]

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15. [WARNING for rape/sexual assault]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #381.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Last week I met up with people I trained with for the first time in six months. All really great contacts, and to an extent friends (we spent ten hours a day together for six months, and are all very similar backgrounds/age profiles).

Well I'd gone out drinking with work colleagues earlier that day, and after a couple hours and bottles of rum, with drinking games, they ended up calling an ambulance to take me to A&E. Apparently I was fine right up to the point where I went to the kitchen, then couldn't get up.

I'm seeing them again in a couple days. How do I recover from this fairly substantial faux pas?

I'm a bit confused about who is who. Did you go out drinking twice in one day, once with work colleagues, and once with the people you trained? And were they people you trained for a work-related function?

Yes, and yes.

Oh. Well, I guess start off with thanking them for taking care of you, say you just drank too quickly and it hit you hard, and apologize for the trouble. Then move on.

Well setting aside any obvious guesses on who you are as a named user...

I don't think there's anything, except apologize and hope they're understanding and like you. Like, it's a big enough, embarrassing enough thing that there's not much you can really do. You'll probably have some concern at first, and then some mockery, which you just have to take, but I don't think there's anything except time and grace and maybe buy them lunch or something.

(reply from suspended user)

no! not in the slightest.

Stella is the only resident ~~alcoholic~~ lover of drink we have here?

I honestly can't think who you're implying?

eh, whoever it is wanted to keep anon, i'm not going to say who i think it is

Re: Need a Little Input

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-26 02:08 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-26 02:09 (UTC) - Expand

lots of people here drink...

that's true. and there's nothing wrong with drinking. it's other things in the post that make me think it might or might not be someone in particular. but i could definitely be talking out my ass.

come on

you can't just tease us like this

at least give us a hint!

I'd probably just go "hey guys, sorry about last time. Thanks for taking care of me. Guess I misjudged my limits, so I'll be taking it easy on the booze for a while." and just try to leave it at that. Acknowledge that it happened, that you'll avoid having it happen again, and then let it go. Generally, the less of a deal you make out of it, the less of a deal it will be.

I would:

1) Apologize profusely and stress that this was an unusual thing for you. (It IS an unusual one-off occurrence, isn't it?) If it was due to a medical condition that you're willing to disclose, mention it in passing but don't go into a lot of TMI detail.

2) Thank them for looking out for you, because you'd be surprised how many "friends" ditch someone in a similar position.

3) Emphasize that you'll make sure it won't happen again and then make sure it doesn't by changing your drinking habits. That blacking out shit right there is dangerous.

>measuring how much they're drinking in bottles of spirits
>>once off

anon be honest, what do you think

ayrt - Yeah, I know. I think that's a terrible idea, but... *shrugs*

Thank them for looking out for you. I don't think you need to say anything beyond than that -- if you try to assure them that you don't have a drinking problem, for example, they're probably gonna get the opposite impression.

this

I'm glad you're okay, but I hope you won't do this again. Health issues aside, this is not a great way to maintain a professional relationship between colleagues.

also this

If they're playing drinking games in the first place, it kinda says that they've got something more than a professional relationship as a group. Which for connections can almost be better.

Since it ended in a trip to the ER, gonna have to disagree with you re: professional benefits of drinking games with colleagues.

Hang out and socialize with colleagues? Great! Play games, do activities that bond you as a group? Okey dokey! Get drunk off your asses? Uh, no. Because look, even if it works out okay a few times, this is a situation that's more than statistically likely to end badly in one way or another. It's awkward working with people who got so drunk they took a dump in your closet by mistake. It's awkward to find out that Bob from Accounting thinks you're hot after he's had a few and if he didn't have a wife and three kids, he'd gladly give you one. It's awkward to have to hold someone's hair back while they eject their stomach contents into a toilet knowing that next week, you'll be trusting them to finish a report on time.

All of that is easily avoided by not getting stinking ass drunk with your co-workers. The potential benefits aren't worth the risk.

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-26 00:20 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) - 2014-04-26 00:23 (UTC) - Expand

diet_poison - 2014-04-26 01:48 (UTC) - Expand

You don't need to go into any essay on the reasons. Just apologise (social courtesy), express a bit of embarrassment, make sure to thank them for looking out for you and move on. They may be a bit concerned, just tell them you're alright now, thank them, maybe say it won't happen again in the future if necessary (miscalculated how much you can drink, turn it around as a learning moment. Maybe laugh about how you "won't do that again".

That's...that's it. Try not to let it worry you.

If it were me I'd go into work laughing about what a dumbass I was and bring them all tiny bottles of alcohol (like those little 1oz vodka bottles you can get from the liquor store) as a joke gift, replete with quips like, "Hey, brought you some of the blood they saved from the ER."

I would then seriously thank them for being awesome about the whole thing.