fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2686 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2686 ⌋

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So I had a college friend who was pretty feminist and pro-GLBT; she was always more fiscally conservative, but her social views were, like most of the people at the school, very left-leaning. She even protested some things religious students had done to protest the progressive views.

A few years out of college, she's suddenly posting all these things that are the exact opposite, and I can't figure it out. She did get married, but she was dating the guy in school, so I don't think that's it. This isn't the first time that's happened either. All I can think is that people like that either changed their views once they left school and returned to their more conservative families and communities, or they're kind of gearing what they say towards certain people. But I like to think this friend wouldn't do the latter?

I also realize people generally do get more conservative in their later twenties - compared to my 22 year old self, some of my views are way more conservative, even though conservatives themselves would probably consider them liberal. But going from "if two people love each other, they deserve equal rights" to "gay people are trying to silence Christians" seems like quite the leap. :/

Anyone else have anything like that happen with their friends?

My friend went from a liberal, sane person to a SJW. So...yes.

And how did she change? I mean, is she suddenly saying that women should not be able to vote?

AYRT

Oh, that happened to another friend as well - sort of. I'm not sure I'd call her a SJW, but she has all these random causes she keeps going, and even if you agree 90% but have 10% you don't agree with, nope, don't bother going there.

I don't know if the woman one was entirely her, but she had something on her wall that was... shockingly slut shaming. However, someone else posted it so it may not be reflective of her own views.

... joining, not going.

I had a friend in college who was an easy-going, somewhat liberal Buddhist. Toward the end of our time there, he Found Jesus. At first, he just incorporated Christianity into his lifestyle and existing beliefs. But after about a year, he had tumbled down the fundamentalist rabbit hole. He wound up being virulently anti-gay, anti-abortion, and anti-anything-that's-not-Christianity. He bought me and some of our other friends copies of the New Testament and was all, "I feel that I led you astray when I was Buddhist and I want to correct that." We were like, "...wtf."

I dunno, man. Sometimes people just go nuts when they get older. Maybe it's a bit easier to be laid back and live-and-let-live when you're young and have relatively little to use. When people get old and jaded and have mortgages, they can get a bit... selfish. And angry. They start looking for people to blame for problems, while refusing to face the fact that life is more complicated than that.

That, and the whole "Minorities/the gays/women/Democrats are out to get us!" schtick is very, very powerful in that it almost makes a twisted sort of sense if you are 1) not that knowledgeable about politics, the economy or how the world works and 2) don't think very hard about any of those things. As horrible as this sounds, most people fall into this category. It's not that they're stupid or don't care, it's just that they haven't given it a whole lot of critical thought so they're easily led by the sort of spittle flecked scaremongering the right wing specializes in.

What's worse is that a whole lot of middle-class/rich white Christians genuinely believe they're under threat and that their problems are the worst problems, so the fact that others don't see it that way feels like heartless negligence at best and an outright attack at worst. The hardcore group encourages this way of thinking because it rallies the less hardcore people to the cause, so it becomes this vicious cycle people do not break out of because it's too hard.

I have no idea what happened to your college friend, since she's not that old. Maybe something happened that damaged her idealism and this is how she retreats. Some people are like that. They knew ONE awful woman on welfare and suddenly everyone on welfare is a bloodsucking parasite. They knew ONE marriage broken up because the husband was gay and now all gay people are out to destroy the hets. If they gave it some sensible thought, they'd realize how silly this was, but as I said earlier, most people won't do that level of thinking even if they were capable of it.

idk, I think it's a little more complicated than that. Young people can be extremely loud, angry, blameful of others and prone to oversimplify complicated things, and can take absolutely everything very personally, to the point that they quite often look "nuts" to older people. They often mellow out a bit as they get older and more experienced, lose some of that youthful zeal and have to devote more of their energy to practical day-to-day matters. Then sometimes they do get more jaded and angry about different things when they grow older still.

I think it depends a great deal on the person and what their life experiences are as they go along.

I don't think that conflicts with anything I said, though?

She might just be posting a certain way to "look good" to her community I have a friend or two that post things quite a bit more religious and conservative than they actually are specifically because their families are watching their Facebooks. That, or they actually have two Facebooks, one for the "public image" and one for "who they really are". Given that they are still living with their families, they face a very real threat of being ostracized, over-controlled, or kicked out if they do not comply with their families' expectations of them. Your friend might be worried about losing her job, her current living situation, or even just some friend/family support if she doesn't look conservative.

I had a friend in high school who became a crazy gun nut late in college with practically no warning. She'd never been exactly anti-gun before, but she never expressed strong views either way and her parents never seemed to have raised her to have these opinions. My friend did suffer a personal tragedy shortly before this change occured, but it wasn't anything a gun would have fixed. I suppose it did shake up her world a bit and that could have lead to some paranoia.

[ SECRET POST #2686 ]

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