[ SECRET POST #2704 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2704 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 022 secrets from Secret Submission Post #386.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 1 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: gotta vent

[(Anonymous)]

How long has he been like that? If the job was a mental-ballbuster then, even though 14 hours a week seems low, he might just need some time to decompress.

Everyone has different breaking strains, and saying just because you can cope at 50 hours a week, albeit with feeling miserable, he should feel just as miserable and worn out is pretty non-cool. Give him a few weeks and see what happens.

On the other hand if it has been more than three months, fuck that guy, he's had his holiday and time to get back in the market.

Also, once he is back in the harness, maybe you should think about quitting or finding somewhere less brutal too. Otherwise you'll just get more bitter and be ready to turn everything into the misery olympics.

Re: gotta vent

[misty_anon]

I'd agree with you except that the OP's said s/he's having to cover his/her brother's share of the bills. If the brother needs time to decompress, fine, but he needs to not be mooching off his sibling and depleting the sibling's savings to do it.

Re: gotta vent

[(Anonymous)]

Family supports eachother. If you need to support a sibling for a couple of months to help them avoid a nervous breakdown then so be it. One day they'll probably carry you too, unless you drive them off by bitching non-stop at them and drive them back to that nervous breakdown they stepped away from. Notice my advice was conditional and time limited, not absolute. I also advised that once the sibling was back in work and on their feet, that the OP actually take advantage of that family support network themself to get some mental breathing space.

Re: gotta vent

[misty_anon]

Aaaand who's supporting the op while s/he does 50 hrs a week at a back-breaking job? Instead the op gets told to stop whining by her family because s/he is pissing them off.

Re: gotta vent

[diet_poison]

holy shit, anon. OP doens't how their brother a damn thing here. It's nice to support family, but you make it sound like they're obligated to do it when they're working overtime to his nothing, and had to sacrifice a personal goal they were saving for to keep his ass afloat. That's really, really unfair to OP

Re: gotta vent

[(Anonymous)]

One day they'll probably carry you too

LMAO

I have news for you. Not everyone is that lucky in the family lottery.

Re: gotta vent

[(Anonymous)]

As someone that nearly went destitute because she had an older brother that mooched off her and refused to work because of "wanting to avoid a nervous breakdown", it really isn't as easy as this. He didn't qualify for disability, so there was no coverage coming in from him, and I was working 45-50 hour weeks while he ate all our food and wasted electricity playing video games and watching movies all day.

There's a difference between supporting and carrying. I could not continue to carry his burden and hold my apartment (and eat, for that matter), so I had to force him out. He's couch-surfing with a wealthier friend now, and from what I'm hearing, he's getting pretty damned close to kicking him out too.

I love him, I do. But at some point, "avoiding a nervous breakdown" is just an excuse. And I'm saying this as someone with a diagnosed anxiety disorder. Sometimes you actually do just have to meet it head-on. He doesn't want to work, so he doesn't, and it isn't fair for him to simply drain resources.