fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2719 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2719 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Jared Leto, Doctor Strange]

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03.

[WarioWare, Inc.: Mega Microgame$]

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04.

[Star Trek: The Next Generation]

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05.

[Odd Thomas]

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06.

[Murdoch Mysteries]

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07. http://i.imgur.com/4VlZYj4.png
[porny, illustrated]

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08.

[Big Time Rush]

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09. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

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10. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

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11. [SPOILERS for OUaT]

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12. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]
http://i.imgur.com/U7UnmUI.png
[gore]

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13. [WARNING for abuse]

[Lie to Me]

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14. [WARNING for dub-con/non-con/etc]

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15. [WARNING for suicide]

[Rick and Morty]

Notes:

Might be ANOTHER 12 am day. Response time will again be slow, sorry.

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Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Somehow I ended up on this topic with a co-worker, and realized that my definition of "platonic" is apparently wrong. I always just thought it meant friendship, non-romantic, etc., but that it could still be sexual (like a friends with benefits type relationship for example). But apparently it specifically means non-sexual?

And kind of related I guess, the concept of romance without sex seems to be fairly well-known here (and elsewhere online) but it doesn't seem to be a thing when you look at the Greek words for love. By their definitions, romantic has to involve sex. I don't know if it's just a lack of them having a specific word because maybe the concept isn't something anyone thought of back then, or if I just misinterpreted the other types and it could fall under one of them, or it's just not really an actual thing after all.

I got kind of curious and did a bit of researching, but just ended up more confused. What about ideas like "passion" and "intimacy"? Those are distinct concepts in my mind, with specific definitions. The fact that someone can be "passionate" about politics (just an example; substitute music or sports or whatever else) seems to illustrate (at least to me) that it obviously doesn't have to be something sexual in nature, and I think of intimacy more in terms of emotional openness, but I seem to keep coming across things that use them both as euphemisms for sex.

So now I'm wondering how other people define these things. How do you all define these ideas and words? Do you agree with all the Greek words and concepts? Do you think some of them aren't actually distinct and should fall under the same category? Are there some that are missing? I'd love to know everyone's thoughts!

(It seems like this sort of topic is discussed here fairly often so I thought you guys would have some interesting thoughts on the subject. Sorry if this is the wrong place to post it!)

I think that language shapes the minds that use it. Unless you are a native (ancient) Greek speaker, I don't think that the concepts they're dealing with are going to translate exactly.

As far as the Greek words go, I've always been taught that Eros is the only love that involved sexual feelings. You can still have strong feelings or emotions regarding a person/thing with the others (agape/philia) but you don't want to bang them.

Eros is the only love that involved sexual feelings.

That's what I was thinking. Eros=sexual, and the only one that would fit what we would nowadays describe as "romantic". I thought philia was more for friends/family (so definitely *not* romantic) and agape was more "spiritual" and almost like a religious thing (like a religious person would say they love their god), so not romantic, either. But I guess non-sexual romance (and even romance in general, or at least what we think of as romance today), was just not a concept that existed back then (and I guess doesn't even exist today in a lot of places/for a lot of people).

I read these words as

Platonic = definitely non-sexual but can be romantic
Passion = doesn't have to be sexual or even romantic
Intimacy = doesn't have to be sexual or even romantic

Other than platonic, which I was apparently wrong about (although now I feel like we need another word for what I thought it meant), I agree. The way I've always thought about it, passion doesn't have to be sexual or romantic or even directed at a person, and intimacy doesn't have to be sexual or romantic, it's a more emotional thing that can also be with family or friends or whoever.

I *think* Greeks lumped non-sexual-but-romantic-ish feelings in with non-romantic feelings (philia/agape). They didn't have as much of a tendency as we do to conflate certain feelings (that we would describe as romantic) with sex or assume that certain feelings MUST go hand-in-hand with sexual desire if you have any sex drive at all. So I don't think they drew a line between platonic feelings and all feelings that we would describe as romantic, but, rather, between platonic feelings and sexual-romantic feelings.

I was thinking that philia and agape were more about family/friends and religion so that confused me, but it's sounding like what we consider romantic today isn't a concept that they really had back then.

So I don't think they drew a line between platonic feelings and all feelings that we would describe as romantic, but, rather, between platonic feelings and sexual-romantic feelings.

That totally makes sense! It sounds like there wasn't a word back then for what I'm thinking of, which I guess shouldn't surprise me since it seems like a fairly new concept. Thanks!

ayrt

I think you're correct that philia and agape is *more* about family/friends/religion, but I suppose its not totally clear-cut and categorized -- it's possible to have a deep friendship that contains some "romantic" (at least by our definition) elements or strong romantic parallels without being sexual-romantic or involving any sexual desire/attraction whatsoever.

However, I think the way we define romantic has a lot more to do with cultural cues, like stories and songs, that we tell ourselves about what "romantic" means and what "romantic" is supposed to be combined with, rather than about concrete, distinctly categorizable feelings.

As far as I know, just means relating to Plato, if we're talking ancient Greece. Not as in loving Plato, the bearded philosopher, though. Hah.

As in to do with Plato's idea that everything has a perfect essence, like a crystalised idea of it, of which human feelings are just shadowy, imperfect reflections.

Obviously that's not how we use the term now. Words change their meanings all the time. I'd say for it to mean totally non-sexual relationships is a common usage.

[ SECRET POST #2719 ]

Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff

Re: Greek words for love? Word definitions? And related stuff