Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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fandomsecrets2014-07-11 06:45 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2014-07-11 06:45 pm
[ SECRET POST #2747 ]
⌈ Secret Post #2747 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
01.
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02.
[The Hobbit/Thorin Oakenshield]
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03.
[The Vincent Black Shadow]
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04.
[El Goonish Shive]
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05.
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06.
[Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries]
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07.
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08.
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09.
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10.
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11.
[Penny Dreadful]
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12.
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13.
[Supernatural]
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14.
[Blake's 7]
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15.
[Edge of Tomorrow/Tom Cruise]
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16.
[Quirk]
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17.
[Homestuck]
18. [WARNING for rape]
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19. [WARNING for rape]
Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #392.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 1 2 (tw: rape) - not!secrets ], [ 1 (?) - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - ships it ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 08:50 am (UTC)(link)"Recently I’ve come across several groups and stories promoting “rape fantasy” one story in which a rape outreach counselor mentioned “rape” as the number one fantasy women have.
First let me say I question the training any counselor had in which they weren’t taught about the difference of rape and ravishment.
Secondly I would like to take the time to explain the difference between the two and what women really fantasize about and why.
Counselors are taught about “ravishment” fantasy which is what most women actually want,
From 1973 through 2008, nine surveys of women’s “rape” fantasies have been published. They show that about four in 10 women admit having them (31 percent) with a median frequency of about once a month.
For the latest report (Bivona, J. and J. Critelli. “The Nature of Women’s Rape Fantasies: An Analysis of Prevalence, Frequency, and Contents,” Journal of Sex Research (2009) 46:33), psychologists at North Texas University asked 355 college women: How often have you fantasized being overpowered/forced/raped by a man/woman to have oral/vaginal/anal sex against your will?
Sixty-two percent said they’d had at least one such fantasy. But responses varied depending on the terminology used. When asked about being “overpowered by a man,” 52 percent said they’d had that fantasy, the situation most typically depicted in women’s romance fiction. But when the term was “rape,” only 12 percent said they’d had the fantasy. These findings are in the same ballpark as previous reports.
Rape fantasies can be either erotic or aversive. In erotic fantasies, the woman thinks: “I’m being taken and I enjoy it.” In aversive fantasies, she thinks: “I’m being forced and I hate it.” 45% of the women in the recent survey who had fantasies said that they were entirely erotic. 9 % were entirely aversive.
Marta Meana, a psychology professor at the University of Nevada, offers an arguably more disturbing theory. She points to research suggesting that 1) “in comparison with men, women’s erotic fantasies center less on giving pleasure and more on getting it”; 2) “as measured by the frequency of fantasy, ************ and sexual activity, women have a lower sex drive than men”; and 3) “within long-term relationships, women are more likely than men to lose interest in sex.” These and other findings fit her theory that female desire is driven by “being desired.”
So does reproductive logic, according to Chivers:
[O]ne possibility is that instead of it being a go-out-there-and-get-it kind of sexuality, it’s more of a reactive process. If you have this dyad, and one part is pumped full of testosterone, is more interested in risk taking, is probably more aggressive, you’ve got a very strong motivational force. It wouldn’t make sense to have another similar force. You need something complementary.
And here’s where it gets icky.
A symbolic scene ran through Meana’s talk of female lust: a woman pinned against an alley wall, being ravished. Here, in Meana’s vision, was an emblem of female heat. The ravisher is so overcome by a craving focused on this particular woman that he cannot contain himself; he transgresses societal codes in order to seize her, and she, feeling herself to be the unique object of his desire, is electrified by her own reactive charge and surrenders. … [Meana] spoke about the thrill of being wanted so much that the aggressor is willing to overpower, to take.
Does this mean women want to be raped? No. Both theories assume the opposite. And that’s a pretty safe assumption, given the logical impossibility of willing a violation of your will. The challenge is to explain the data on rape fantasies and arousal from sexual assault, given that nobody literally wants to be raped. What part of rape or the idea of rape is arousing? And what part of the woman is aroused?
The theory, which Meana frankly calls narcissism, posits a clear answer. We generally define rape as sex against the victim’s will. But a woman mentally aroused by a sexual assault fantasy isn’t thinking about the victim’s will. She’s thinking about the perpetrator’s. She’s imagining being wanted. That’s what she wants—and the fact that she wants it exposes the fantasy, by definition, as not really rape. The imaginary act arouses her not because the woman in the scenario doesn’t want it, but because the man does.
Its dangerous to call things Rape, that are not in fact rape, it sends out a message that somehow on some level people want and accept it.
I hope this article will lead others to chose their words more carefully and hopefully understand what it is that is wanted, ravishment and what is never wanted, rape."
Remember when you told people describing what is basically ravishment that was rape too? Congratulations fandom, you have convinced people that rape is something to be desired.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 10:04 am (UTC)(link)no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 10:16 am (UTC)(link)It's a dutch blog that focuses on this kind of fantasies.
no subject
On the other hand, I don't think folk neglecting to use another term that suggests better rape is as important as not applying the same fantasies or tropes to real life. Not gonna deny that there's stupidity, but I'm not going to blow my lid when someone is obviously talking about ravishment or whatever preferable word.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 10:26 am (UTC)(link)no subject
But even though "rape is love" sounds really tasteless, unnecessary softening because rape is the harsher word right now is just beating around the bush when fandom is going to know exactly what your meaning when you bring it up in that context.
no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 11:09 am (UTC)(link)no subject
(Anonymous) 2014-07-12 11:11 am (UTC)(link)no subject