fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2781 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2781 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[Game of Thrones]

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09. [broken]

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[Kevin Sorbo/Hercules: The Legendary Journeys]

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[Transformers: Prime]

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[Darkchylde]

Notes:

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Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

My fandom has become really toxic this past year, and has gone from slight difference-of-opinions into all-out harassment and bullying. Even worse, the second that anyone who is being bullied stands up for themselves, they suddenly become the bad guy. I've been a victim of this trend myself, and let me tell you, it is not fun. There's a convention coming up this November in my hometown, and I recently learnt that one of the girls responsible for most of this bullying will be there. I go to this con every year, but if there's any chance that I might run into her, then I might not go.

When did fandom become so nasty?

About three hours after fandom came into existence, I'd imagine, which puts it in the vicinity of fifty years ago. It's not a recent thing, it's been happening for a very long time.

Less flippantly, I'm sorry about your fandom going toxic. I hope that you have fun if you go to the con.

I don't think fandom in general is any nastier than it was in the beginning... it's just that opinions are a lot more accessible, thanks to the internet. And it can vary from fandom to fandom.

Try not to let the fandom butthole get you down. If most of her bullying takes place on the internet, she's either likely socially retarded in real life or she will give her bitchy self away immediately (so people can avoid her like the plague). I doubt she'll recognize you unless you've told everyone your real name and hometown. If she has the guts to harass you IRL, hopefully you can report her and/or hang around some nice friends.

Well, obviously I can't say if any of this or none of this will happen. But don't let a jerk like that keep you from having fun. Especially on your home turf.

Fandom has always been nasty. It's just where you find yourself.

I think you should go to the con. Don't let the girl ruin your time. And if you meet her? Just say you don't want to talk to her because she's a bully who bullied you personally and you don't associate with those kinds of people. Take a friend with you if you're super worried. I doubt you'll see her though. It's a con.

This is, unfortunately, something that has been happening in fandom for a long, long time. I've left a fandom due to bullying.

And this may seem a little counterintuitive, but if you think you'll see your cyberbullies at the con, then I actually think this would be a good reason to go. A lot of people bully online because they see themselves as attacking an username or icon, and don't always see/consider that they are attacking a person. If you go - and you go under/with your username very clear - then in the future, the cyberbullies won't just see a profile or username in their mind when they start spewing the vitriol, but they'll see an actual person. They won't be able to ignore that what they are saying is being seen/read by an actual person (especially if you make it clear that you identify yourself with your username - they won't even able to think/pretend they're attacking a sockpuppet account.)

I understand this doesn't always work for every situation. But honestly, if you love the con, go. If this bullying is a recent trend, then the bullying may not even be likely to happen at the con. If it does, maybe it can be a good time to find other people who have been bullied and band together to defend yourselves as a collective group.

Did you join one of jlarinda's fandoms or what?

It doesn't bode well that I know exactly who you mean and for this exact reason.

I'm sorry to hear that your fandom has gotten so toxic. Sadly this seems to be a big trend in fandom, and Tumblr has kind of made it worse. I personally have backed off my involvement with people in fandom due to some bad experiences. Don't get me wrong, I've had some good ones too, but I've been really hurt by some fandom folk. I still contribute to fandom, just not as vocally as I used to.

But as for the con, you should go. It's just one person, and like others have said, she might be super awkward and when around other people, it's likely she won't be able to pull the same shit she's been pulling. It's different when you can hide behind a screen.

[ SECRET POST #2781 ]

In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying

Re: In-fandom bullying