fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2794 ]

[ SECRET POST #2794 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2794 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Apparently mine is weird, but.not for the reasons you'd think.

I'm into strapons, with guys and girls. I'm apparently really damn good at it. But I'm not a hardcore domme or anything. I do like being a sort of dominant top but that isn't particularly bondagy most of the time. I just learned I like being in charge.

This isn't an issue with girls, but most guys on the internet appear to want me to really demean them, even feminize them. I'm too nice for my kink! I just wanna call you a slut, not worthless!

This is similar to me. I'm not into hardcore BDSM, but I do like being in charge and really don't like being at all submissive. Although, I am kind of into bondage. But only in the "you're tied up, so I can really be in charge" kind of way. I'm not into pain play or sadism at all.

Also, yay strapons.

Strapons are awesome, but yeah - guys tend to be either intimidated or the full submissive nine yards (been there, done that, and it just tires me)

Or they want to be submissive in everything. Like, I don't want to run your life, I just want to boss you around in bed.

Or they claim to be submissive but they make it all about you doing the things that are their kinks and satisfying them and really aren't that submissive at all.

Or they post messages to women who label themselves as dominant wanting to be the one man who can tame and dominate her.

Yes, I don't post on kink sites anymore. Even if you pretend to be in a relationship the guys are creepy.

I hate the idea of a dom being like 'now go pee', 'now go brush your teeth'. I mean...tedious, time consuming, and boooooooring.

Agreed. That is a thing for some people, and great for them, but I don't get it. I like a guy trusting me to lead in bed because it is hot and empowering. I don't want to run their life, though. I have enough trouble running my own. That isn't hot, it's stressful.

Ha, yes! Plus - that's kinda like having a toddler or something. Just...not my thing.

It's mostly the submissive in everything that bugs me.

I actually had relatively okay experiences with sub guys - like, genuinely nice, not creepy. But it just drains me if the relationship is in function of that. Like, I like some kink in bed, not a 24/7 arrangement.

Yup, agreed. Like, I get that for some people it satisfies other, non-sexual needs. But for me it is purely sexual. And yes, totally training to have to run someone else's life.

So, how hard is it to have sex with a strap on? I mean - you obviously can't feel it, so is it pretty easy to jab someone the wrong way/place, etc.? Is the whole hip-thrust thing difficult to do/time/adjust?

I seems like fun, but also a good way to accidentally ram into a sensitive area or something (like, my cervix, when i had one, was tilted and kind of down, so 'deep' penetration could hit it and OW OW FUCKING OW). Kinda killed the mood.

They are actually designed to fit on so the other end of it touches your clit. So you do get to feel something, just not the actual penetration part.

Honestly, I don't find it any harder than using a dildo on myself. And I tend to have a lot of hip thrusts when I'm being penetrated too, so it seems mostly natural.

If it is with a guy, finding the prostate can be a bit difficult, but usually you figure the right angle out eventually.

Huh, interesting. Good to know. Thanks!

Not that hard, actually. The hardest part for me was actually getting over being self-aware, but the movement itself sort of came naturally. And I had a double-ended one back in the day, so I did have feedback.

The hip-thrust is a bit different than if you're having piv sex, but it's not an unnatural movement.

As always though, too much lube is better than too little.

Huh. I hadn't thought that you would get that much information transmitted through it (I guess I figured the material would be too dense or something). Interesting. :)

It would not be the same as actually having a penis in an orifice, obviously. But you can feel pressure, yes, so you'd definitely know if you were just slamming in (also, your partner's reactions are pretty telling anyway).

Sure. I just imagine being kind of crooked and not really knowing it or something, until you've pushed just in the *wrong* spot....

But hey - experimentation and practice are good things. :)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #2794 ]

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