fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #2795 ]

⌈ Secret Post #2795 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

[Law & Order: Criminal Intent]

__________________________________________________

03.

[Fred Astaire/Ginger Rogers]

__________________________________________________

04.

[Jeeves and Wooster]

__________________________________________________

05.

[Yahtzee/Zero Punctuation]

__________________________________________________

06.

[Markiplier]

__________________________________________________

07.

[Jackie Chan Adventures]

__________________________________________________

08.

[The Parent Trap]

__________________________________________________

09.

[Alexander]

__________________________________________________

10.

[Starsky and Hutch]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 012 secrets from Secret Submission Post #399.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Yeah but I don't really get it.

I can't imagine myself enjoying gin. It tastes horrible. That doesn't mean I can't imagine some gin enthusiast enjoying gin as much as I enjoy bourbon. I don't need to put myself literally in their shoes to emphasize.

Edited 2014-08-29 02:37 (UTC)

I like gin and bourbon.

I don't think that OP of this subthread was saying that they can't imagine someone feeling romantic tenderness towards another woman; just that they can't imagine what feeling that kind of romantic tenderness towards another woman themselves is like. You can relate it to your own feelings but that's not the same as sharing them.

To use your example, you could imagine the kind of enjoyment a gin drinker gets out of drinking, and make the (reasonable and probably correct) assumption that it's very similar to the kind of enjoyment that you have for bourbon. But you couldn't feel that way about gin, and if you were trying to imagine the experience of drinking gin and feeling that kind of enjoyment about gin instead of bourbon, I think it's reasonable to say that there might be a disconnect. So, like, I can make a reasonable assumption that the romantic feelings someone has for a woman are similar to my own romantic feelings. But I don't think I can really imagine them; all I'm really doing is substituting my own existing romantic feelings, and when I really try to envision having those feelings for a woman, there's a disconnect somewhere along the line.

i guess i'm kind of saying that it's a difference between an intellectual and an emotional understanding.

But that doesn't really make sense.

Can I imagine me, Chardmonster, enjoying gin? Not really. I just don't like it.

Can I imagine the act of enjoying gin is pretty similar to how I enjoy bourbon? Absolutely! Both are liquor.

I guess I'm saying I don't understand this disconnect. It's not as if romance is that alien if you swap the genders. We aren't talking about different species here.

OP

I think what the person above described is what's making it hard to relate. I can understand on an intellectual level that how my straight friend feels about her boyfriend is the same way I feel about my girlfriend but I can't imagine ME feeling that way about a guy.

I guess maybe I'm just putting way more emphasis on gender than I should. I've never dated a guy so maybe I'm just imagining that it's SO much different than dating a girl when it really isn't?

[ SECRET POST #2795 ]

Re: Finding it hard to identify with people/characters of a different sexual orientation?

Re: Finding it hard to identify with people/characters of a different sexual orientation?

Re: Finding it hard to identify with people/characters of a different sexual orientation?

Re: Finding it hard to identify with people/characters of a different sexual orientation?

Re: Finding it hard to identify with people/characters of a different sexual orientation?