[ SECRET POST #2862 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2862 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 042 secrets from Secret Submission Post #409.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ], [ 1 - random textless image ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Where does fantasy/idealization come into it though? Are you genuinely arguing that it's not possible to love some deeply while still being aware that neither they nor you are anywhere near 'perfect.'

Is everyone deeply in love, then, according to your definition, vaguely deluded?

[intrigueing]

Not at all? How did you get any of that from my comment?

What I meant was that love doesn't really work like...I dunno, an ovary. You don't just run out of love after you expend a certain quantity on someone. So if you love someone truly and deeply, that should not be synonymous with not really caring about any other people.

[(Anonymous)]

How did you get "running out of love" out of ANY of these comments?

How did you get "not loving someone else as much" as being "can't care about other people at all"?

People will love different people to different degrees. They may continue to do so after the relationship has ended. If you call things like that unhealthy or narcissistic then you're calling human nature unhealthy and narcissistic.

[intrigueing]

I got that from the secret -- saying "they could never ever love anyone else half as much."

Different degrees and intensities, I definitely get for sure. Dude, basically alllll my favorite fandom stuff is about best friends and incredibly special found family and couples.

But a) "not even half as much" is a really extreme difference in intensity.

and b) saying "They DON'T love anyone else half as much" is very different from "They CAN'T love anyone else half as much."

I think I didn't word my comment two levels above this one very well -- I didn't mean that the only reason people would have different levels of love was if everyone else was an asshole or if they couldn't let anyone else close. I meant that for the difference to be that extreme and for the idea of loving someone else even almost as much to be that out of the realm of possibility, the situation would have to be kind of out of the ordinary.

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt

for what it's worth, I understood you the first time. Loving someone more than any other person is not the same as being unable to love anyone anywhere near that much.

though I think that it's probably common for people to never be able to find another person who fits with them so well.