[ SECRET POST #2863 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2863 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Zen Pencils]


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03.
[The Prince of Egypt]


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04.
[Walking Dead]


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05.
[The Penguins of Madagascar & The Invisible Pink Unicorn]


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06.
[Transformers: Robots in Disguise 2015]


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07.
[Sleepy Hollow]


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08.
[Holly Madison]


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09.
[Sergio Perez, Formula 1]















Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 033 secrets from Secret Submission Post #409.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[ariakas]

Yeah, but in the actual Biblical story, Ramses wants to let the slaves go after a certain point before it ever gets to the death of the firstborn, but God actively "hardens his heart" so that he can get his wrath on anyway.

Which is to say that God mind-controlled somebody into rejecting a peaceable solution so that he could murder tens of thousands of infants.

Remember: God is Love!

[(Anonymous)]

Oh pish. Only post-rehab New Testament God is love.

Old Testament God is a raging bi-polar alcoholic.

[(Anonymous)]

Because the god who gave us Revelations is sooo much better than the meal old Jewish god!

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not sure how much that's God and how much it's John the Revelator having ingested some bad mushrooms.

[(Anonymous)]

God didn't give us relevations. A dude halucinating did.

[(Anonymous)]

And this is why all you Atheist scum will be put into reeducation camps alongside the fags and the dykes after our newly Divinely elected Congress impeaches that Muslim and sends him and his Niggar breathren and all the other foreign scum back to where they belong and nuke Africa and the middle east so they never bother us or use thier Ebola to infect us again.

Then you and you Athiest and Dykes and Fags will learn to true word of a wrathful and vengeful God.

[(Anonymous)]

Shut up, cretin. Jews rule.

[raspberryrain]

There may have been an earlier polytheistic (well, henotheistic?) version of that story that made more sense.

If the god of the Egyptians hardened Pharaoh's heart, the god of the Hebrews could have been merely fighting nasty to get his people out?

[cakemage]

It depends on the version of the Bible you've got, though. In some versions, God's the one who "hardens" Ramses' heart, in others it's the devil. Either way, God was psyched to have an excuse to kill children for the sins of their parents.

[(Anonymous)]

Hey, I was done with Jehovah after learning that he called a she-bear to kill those little kids who were teasing Elisha. What a nasty piece of work.

[cakemage]

Don't forget Ananais and Sapphira, struck dead for lying about how much money they were giving to the church. A dick move on their part, to be sure, but damn does God have one itchy trigger finger.

[tabaqui]

Fucking this. Jayzus, so fucked up and gross.

[ketita]

*shrug* there are commentaries meant to make sense of this on a non-literal level, because not everything in the Bible is meant to be read literally anyway, idk if you're interested since you're doing the bashing thing.

[ariakas]

Oooooooh it's okay, I've read plenty of Christian apologetics, including apologetics of the Old Testament. I know exactly how that line can be interpreted in a metaphorical way.

But the thing is, this story never actually happened, so if we're making a movie out of it as if everything in it (magic, plagues, and all) were literal reality, then there's no getting out of a literal reading of God making the Pharaoh's decision for him instead of letting him decide. If Pharaoh relents he doesn't get to unleash the plagues, so he makes sure Pharaoh can't. Which makes sense if you think about it - if Ramses says "sure, whatever, go then" there's no awe and terror-inspiring story about God's wrath.

I'm not "bashing" God, I'm just telling people what's literally written in the Bible. The Bible says God made Pharaoh reject Moses' request, so the game was rigged from the start. There was never any chance for him to show compassion.

[ketita]

*shrug* not Christian, so I have no idea what they say.

He did actually have several chances to relent earlier, btw, he just refrained. But ok, nice to hear that you're not "bashing".

[ariakas]

So... since God gave him the chance to relent at the frogs and boils stage and he chose not to, God's infringement on his free will so that he had no chance to avoid the genocide of innocent infants is perfectly justified? Is that what you're trying to say here? o_O

[ketita]

no.

[ariakas]

Then what was the point of saying that the Pharaoh had other chances to relent?

[ketita]

Yeah sorry for wasting your time and all, forget it.

[ariakas]

Ooooookaaaaaay.

[(Anonymous)]

That was a really weird and passive-aggressive conversation on your part.

[(Anonymous)]

"because not everything in the Bible is meant to be read literally anyway"

I always found that an interesting claim. By all means don't interpret it literally, because literally, the mythology is frankly untrue. But I guarantee when the Bible was put together, the general consensus wasn't "well some things are just non-literal"

[(Anonymous)]

How and why can you guarantee that? From what we know of civilizations around that time, they didn't take their mythology literally.

[(Anonymous)]

Christianity doesn't have the flexibility of its pre-Christian pagan counterparts, who happily absorbed the gods/myths of their neighbors and even at its height, Roman paganism was more about nationalism than it was upholding dogma. Christianity was built upon dogma, throughout the late antique and medieval periods there are numerous councils debating exactly that (not to mention execution of heretics who preached something even minutely dogmatically different). Genesis WAS a literal creation story through the medieval period, if not longer for a majority of Christians (and worth noting, its still literal today).

It seems to me that there's nothing in the Bible that suggests they are not meant to be taken literally, and to say so runs the risk of essentially retconning it.