[ SECRET POST #2882 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #2882 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 061 secrets from Secret Submission Post #412.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

10. http://i.imgur.com/35wxa6x.jpg?2

[purpleseas]

I've watched and rewatched the whole thing about ten times and still get distracted by that face. It really is like looking into the sun, lol.

[(Anonymous)]

He is awfully photogenic.

[(Anonymous)]

It seems to me that the idea of getting 'over' something is, in some ways, a bit of a misconception.

The things that happened to you will always have happened. But that doesn't mean you can't come to live a good, solid, healthy life and be a person that you want to be. And examples from media, where people are unable to do that because the drama must continue endlessly, shouldn't stop you from doing that.

[kallanda_lee]

So much this. You can't undo your past - but you can try to keep it from hijacking your future.

[kribban]

If it makes you feel better nonnie, my best friend was treated like shit by her alcoholic father all her life and she's a wonderful, well-adjusted person.

Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

Seriously, it seems like SO many characters have their main story revolve around daddy issues nowadays. How many of the Marvel characters again? Batman's another big one (Batman Begins makes a MUCH bigger deal about the father's inaction than the mother's). Star Trek. Star Wars. Avatar The Last Airbender. The list goes on and on.

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

You mean father's death (for Batman Begins)? I don't remember anything about 'inaction.'

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

When Bruce is being trained, Ra's al Ghul says:

Henri Ducard: Your parents' death was not your fault.
[Bruce attacks Ducard with his sword]
Henri Ducard: It was your father's.
[Bruce furiously attacks Ducard, but is easily defeated]
Henri Ducard: Anger does not change the fact that your father failed to act.
Bruce Wayne: The man had a gun!
Henri Ducard: Would that stop you?
Bruce Wayne: I've had training!
Henri Ducard: The training is nothing! The will is everything!
[Ducard bests Bruce once again]
Henri Ducard: The will to act.

I mean, honestly, both parents were unarmed and it happened so quickly. So why the heck is the father singled out. Not to mention that Bruce's memories tend to center around his father -- like his father getting him out of the well, for example.

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

DA, but I always thought that scene was just Ducard being manipulative. You're definitely right about the well thing, though. Nothing like that for his mum.

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

How in the world does ATLA consistute daddy issues? Katara, at least, seems far more affected by her mother's death than her father's absence. And Aang has neither parent.

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[iceyred]

Zuko and Azula.

Re: Daddy Issues are horridly overused to begin with...

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah. That's who I was thinking of. Granted, there is at least quite a variety of issues in ATLA. But it does bother me a tad how often mothers are missing.

[kallanda_lee]

You know - the thing is, most people have something in their youth that fucked them up somehow.

If you have daddy issues - own it. I'm serious: Acknowledge it's there, joke about it if you can, but don't let it control your life. It's often the things we wish to hide that fester, not the ones we see for what they are.

[(Anonymous)]

Agreed.

The more you try to either sublimate or hide something, or the more you dwell on the unfairness and blame of it, the more power the person who hurt you continues to have over you. The more they continue to be able to affect and control your life.

It's taken me a very long time to reconcile the fact that, no matter how much things have fucked me up in the past, the one with the power to choose how to react to it now is me. I'm the one who gets to choose whether I let it keep on hurting me, or whether I say "fuck that" and live my life.

[skeletal_history]

Bless you for using season 1 screencaps, OP.

OP:

[(Anonymous)]

Just to clarify, I don't actually watch Supernatural (I've seen a couple episodes, that's it) and I'm not in the fandom.

I just used the picture because I knew that Dean dealt with an abusive father and has been shown to have SERIOUS daddy issues in-canon

And the picture was nice and would let me make a legible secret.

[ibbity]

Movies and tv shows use daddy issues because it's an easy way to give the characters angst. You're not doomed to be stuck with your issues forever just because screenwriters are too lazy to come up with something more original.

[(Anonymous)]

Sometimes I think it's really a guy thing? You don't often have movies or TV shows where the protagonist has angst around his mom or mother figure. It's always the daddy.

Mind you, same goes for most female protagonists. One reason I got frustrated with the movie Contact is that Jodi Foster's character is 100% about her longing for her father and her interactions with men. Dead mother? We don't hear a thing about them. Female friends? She doesn't have any. Etc.

[(Anonymous)]

As someone with mommy issues, rather than daddy issues, I agree.

A lot of people have issues with their parents or know people who do.

[(Anonymous)]

Some writers use their own experiences as background for characters, though sometimes in an exaggerated fashion. Sometimes it's just an easy way to add angst to a character.

[(Anonymous)]

Okay, so I haven't read the other comments to this secret, but I just want to share something with you. I have a pretty good relationship with my dad, but there are some things I just don't feel very supported about with him. Like, my writing. It's just not something I can really share with him, and it's really important to me. At one point in my life, I was able to find a mentor, kind of by accident, an older man (even older than my dad actually!) who also cared about writing. I learned some things from him, I felt supported...I am sure I never told him I felt like he was filling a sort of father figure role for me in that one area of my life, but it...it helped. I think you'll find that you can have various people that fill various holes in your life and help you heal when you need them. Keep your heart open! Also, I never told him how much he meant to me in that way, and I'm not sure if that was good or not...but most guys don't tend to hear "you're like a father to me" as a good thing, so I didn't risk it.

[(Anonymous)]

A lot of time characters don't deal with their parental issues in healthy ways though. Because they're characters and not people, and a lot of times unhealthy or exaggerated emotions are more common in media. I get where your coming from anon, I was abused as a child and sometimes I feel like I'll ever be "over" it, but don't worry too much about ending up like a fictional character. Or maybe find some media where characters are healthy/empowered despite having been abused in the past?

[(Anonymous)]

He looks so pretty in these pictures. Sorry I have nothing to say anon. Maybe therapy or talking to someone about it will help? I know people with some serious parent issues, and talking to a therapist/psychologist really helps them.