[ SECRET POST #3001 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3001 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.


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02.
[Red Dwarf]


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03.
[Tim Gutterson, Justified]


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04.
[Obscurus Lupa; Channel Awesome]


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05.
[Joseph Gordon-Levitt]


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06.
[Blackadder]


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07.
[Buffy the Vampire Slayer]


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08.
[Babylon 5]


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09.
[Pacific Rim]


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10.
[Diana Gabaldon, Outlander series]


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11.
[L.A. Confidential]


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12.
[Koe no Katachi]


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13.
[Cold Case]


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14.
[Amanda Palmer & Neil Gaiman]


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15.
[Sirens]


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16.
[Neighbours]


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17.
[Sleepy Hollow]


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18.
[Neil Gaiman & Amanda Palmer]


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19.
[Garbage - Only happy when it rains]


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20.
[Mary Portas, aka "Mary, Queen of Shops"]










Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 088 secrets from Secret Submission Post #429.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: TW: IDEK secrets? lies? death? regret? everything

[herpymcderp]

I have never regretted my entire life so personally I can't respond to that.

But from the tone of this you sound like you're blaming yourself for something that quite possibly wasn't your fault at all. If your family is against you for something that isn't your doing despite evidence it might be time to disown them, blood or no blood.

Especially if it's as catastrophic as you're making it out to be. You could disappear, move across the country, start over. There are always options. You don't have to stay where you are right now.

Re: TW: IDEK secrets? lies? death? regret? everything

[(Anonymous)]

Here's the thing. That's exactly what I DID, without knowing everything behind it. I basically wrote off this branch of the family, because the family member in question wrote me off. Only now I know WHY. And they're all, "well you decided not to contact blah blah blah" yeah because that wasn't wanted. So this is what the family holds against me, that I had no contact for two decades plus, and disappeared off the map as far as I was concerned. And, much as I would like to, disowning the dead family member will give the enemy the upper hand, at this point. (Like I say, the facts and the evidence are on my side.)

I'm not in a bad situation now, necessarily. But my life would have been very, very, different, if I had known/figured out what was going on, from the beginning. Why was I so stupid?!

Re: TW: IDEK secrets? lies? death? regret? everything

[herpymcderp]

So... why not explain yourself? If that doesn't work and the people you're still trying to reconnect with are determined to hold a grudge for petty reasons, then you'll know they're really not worth the effort.

Re: TW: IDEK secrets? lies? death? regret? everything

[(Anonymous)]

This would be where the stonewalling is coming in. One person denies any of it happened prior to four years ago (untrue), another hasn't replied to the message I left them over a week ago, and the current spouse is the same person who convinced the (now dead) family member to try and sue me in 2008. (It failed, but that was where the no contact was legally cemented. Fact which I have on my side.) I do have one other family member I can try and confront, but haven't found the right opportunity to yet. Likely it will be just another voicemail message, screamed into the void.

They're not the ones holding a grudge (I would be justified in being the one to do so), but they are definitely stonewalling me, when they all knew this was going on for decades. And my life was made considerably worse because of it.

Re: TW: IDEK secrets? lies? death? regret? everything

[herpymcderp]

Then why bother to do anything about it at all? It seems like there's no point in trying to contact them again other than to drag the situation out. Trying to get revenge or set them straight isn't only likely not going to be successful, the trying itself is only adding to the stress you're experiencing.

Time to work on letting it go and moving forward with your life, perhaps. Do something that benefits you like learning a trade or going back to school. It doesn't mean you have to forgive or forget, but it seems like it might just be healthiest to say "fuck it" and move on.