[ SECRET POST #3037 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3037 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 051 secrets from Secret Submission Post #434.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

05. http://i.imgur.com/jlvUVgI.jpg

[(Anonymous)]

Instead of using this person, are there any more honest ways you can interact?

[kallanda_lee]

You might not be doing her favors by not telling, you know.

[asecretchord]

Imagine my level of paranoia right now...


except I'm certainly not important in fandom!

[(Anonymous)]

I'm trying to think of a situation where one person is so important to fandom that you have to pretend to like them for the good of the fandom. Are they a mediocre writer with so much enthusiasm that they're singlehandedly keeping your fandom on life support?

[(Anonymous)]

If they're that important to the fandom (and, presumably, well-liked) then I very much doubt that what you think about them matters to them one way or another.

[(Anonymous)]

You're kind of an asshole, OP.

[(Anonymous)]

congrats, my paranoia has increased. Fuck you asshole.

[(Anonymous)]

If you're experiencing fear or anxiety that's beyond reasonable limits, it's not other peoples' fault or responsibility to protect you. It's impossible, in fact, because paranoia isn't about rational responses to things. It would be far more effective if you could figure out what's causing the paranoia and how you can address it so that it's not on a hair trigger.

[(Anonymous)]

Were you born this much of a patronizing dickhead, or did it take years of hard work?

[(Anonymous)]

I'm LOLing at the people who are paranoid now and think you're an asshole.

Your loved ones lie to keep you happy all the time. They tell you you're better at things than you really are because they don't want to hurt your feelings. Welcome to reality. The only way to get validation is to validate yourself.

[(Anonymous)]

Except OP explicitly said that they're using this person, not just lying purely to spare their feelings.

[(Anonymous)]

What OP is doing could be construed as "using" their fandom friend...if you squint. OP is describing it as "using" because they feel guilty--or have been told they should feel guilty--but just because you feel guilty doesn't mean you've actually done something to warrant it.

[(Anonymous)]

oh, I thought you said autistic.

[(Anonymous)]

misfire

Transcript

[(Anonymous)]

Image: a blue butterfly

Text: You’re really nice, but I hate your writing. I pretend to like it because you’re nice, and because you are important in fandom. I kind of need you.

S!B I feel really bad. I’m using someone, and she’s truly sweet.

Pic related.

[(Anonymous)]

Really worried for just a second that this was me, to be honest. I have a fandom friend who obviously likes talking to me, and enjoys my various posts on...anything...basically, as long as it isn't about my fic (secret, I made a secret about this and want to post it but don't quite understand how). But that could be a lot of people I know and most of them are more popular than me so I'm not sure why anyone would "need" me.

But I have no clue what fandom it is, and maybe if we all knew, we could feel less paranoid.

[(Anonymous)]

Put it up on a hosting site, e.g. tinypic.com and comment in the submission posts with the link.

[(Anonymous)]

Oh shit, I'm afraid this is me...

...well, except for the "important in fandom" part, lol.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm so glad right now I don't have anyone that likes 100% of my work. I definitely know this can't refer to me. I keep telling people "you don't have to read my fics if they don't appeal" and they say back to me "we never intended to" and both sides are happy. I do sometimes feel a little stupid at my repeated insistence, but at least I'm spared situations like this if I ever get bigger in fandom.

[lb_lee]

I'm kind of perplexed as to this even being a THING. I mean, I don't do fanfic much, but I have plenty of people who talk to me because they're purely into my work, or because they like me purely as a friend but want nothing to do with my work. I too am friends with other creators but don't read their work!

Like, why would you NEED to pretend to like their work to talk to them? I don't get it.

--Rogan

[(Anonymous)]

I think it's not so much the OP wanting to keep talking to this person, as the OP hoping fandom friend will stay in fandom and keep creating, even though she doesn't much care for their work, because she's worried that losing this person would hurt the fandom as a whole.

I took it to be a situation where a dozen or so of people are keeping the fandom going, and if even one of them decided to back off because they felt underappreciated, losing them would have a big impact.

That doesn't seem like "using" the fandom friend to me; I think OP is beating herself up unnecessarily and am kind of shaking my head at the "FUCKYOUASSHOLE" bunch upthread.

[lb_lee]

That is still kinda weird to me, but okay, I can sorta get that. It's just... fandoms die. It's the circle of fandom life. It happens. I dunno, it just seems kinda weird to me, but then, I'm not really into fandom.

--Rogan

[(Anonymous)]

WHAT IS THE FANDOM. am slightly concerned this may be about one of my friends.

[(Anonymous)]

That's the best possible reason for OP not to say what the fandom is.