case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2015-04-28 06:48 pm

[ SECRET POST #3037 ]


⌈ Secret Post #3037 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 051 secrets from Secret Submission Post #434.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Re: Chipotle's Facebook page

(Anonymous) 2015-05-01 04:32 am (UTC)(link)
Well, to be fair, it can be both. After repeated incidents of insensitive people dismissing your frustrations by ordering you to calm down... I guess it's like being conditioned to an asshole family member or friend constantly pushing your buttons.

No, it isn't constructive or healthy to react in such a manner.

But one thing I've found in the behavioral health field is that when it comes to the worst things you can possibly say to a person who's gone nuclear (or is about to), "Calm down" is at the top of that list. The reason? A person who's that pissed off has already thrown reason out the window, they aren't interested in anything else that's going to clash with their thoughts. They stop giving a shit. It's fight or flight, and they're ready to tear up something. Most don't realize that, while well-intended, saying "calm down" at that moment can be extremely dismissive and can escalate a situation. The best way of diffusing (or is it defusing? eh) the situation is to hear the person, let them vent, let them know they are being heard, no matter how over-the-top their reaction is, no matter how nuts you think they're being. Be mindful and nonjudgmental, and let them come down from the episode.

Of course, if they still punch you, run like hell.