fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3177 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3177 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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12. http://i57.tinypic.com/35chf9c.jpg
[penis]

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13. http://i.imgur.com/OB1EeH5.jpg
[porn - furry/illustrated]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 042 secrets from Secret Submission Post #454.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Queer isn't the catch-all term? Huh…learn something new every day.

I can never really figure who's allowed to use "slurs" or not. Like, I thought "queer" had been put in the "not slur" category the way "person of color" was -- since white people use person of color too.

But I guess queer is like the n-word then?

Although even the n-word is weird because although black people have reclaimed it, I've been told I should use the work sandni**** even though I've been called that -- which is weird considering I thought it was generally accepted that you could reclaim slurs that had been thrown at you. Not in that case though apparently.

If you're still around, let me explain this, as a queer person.

Queer is still used as a slur. Not as much, but since it's still being used that way, and because it WAS a MUCH worse slur in the past, there actually is, within the LGBT+ community, a lot of intracommunity argument over it. Younger people (I'd say 35-40 and under, but especially in teens to early 30s) are more likely to want to reclaim the word. Older people, who were around when queer was one of the worst slurs, a lot simply don't get it.

To make an analogy, since you've said you're a woman, let's take the word bitch. Myself and a lot of other people have decided to reclaim the word. I have some older feminist friends, late 40s-60s, who absolutely cannot understand why we'd want to reclaim that word. This isn't purely generational, because I have run into people of all ages who don't like reclaiming language and feel the words should just fall out of use entirely. In any group that's discussing stuff like this, there will be people on both sides.

So, when there's argument about it within the community, that you're not part of, yeah, it's something you should not use. In part, because while in this context I can tell that you're not meaning it as a pejorative, it might not be obvious in other uses. Also, and I apologize that this is blunt, it's not your word to reclaim. Does this help explain things better?

For what it's worth, I'm the first anon who replied to you and I have no problem with queer being used as a catch-all. I use it myself, it feels much cleaner to describe the concept of "not-straight" without having to divide into gay, lesbian, bisexual, etc. It's only problematic when people either a) call you a "queer" or b) are homophobic and using it.

Obviously you can use the word yourself if you like, but I don't think there's anything "clean" or appropriate about encouraging straight people to use it.

You choose what you get offended by, and I'll choose what I get offended by, thank you.

If I identify as queer (which I do) then why shouldn't straight people respect and refer to that identity? Not to mention, it's used more often in academia, as in "queer studies" or "queer readings" of a text, and in this case, the word is infinitely more useful than something like "LGBT reading" because that assumes active identities whereas queer doesn't demand categorization (for example, you can do a queer reading of Dracula, but it's more presumptuous to argue that Dracula "identifies" as bisexual or something). Since, unlike many other slurs, queer is actually used as an identity (unlike, say, faggot), it does not have to be offensive.

I meant to say that encouraging straight people to use it as a catch-all is inappropriate. Of course you can tell straight people to call you personally whatever you want them to call you. But it's not okay to refer to an entire community with a word that many in that community still view as a slur.

I refer to them that way. And I am perfectly fine with straight people doing so as well, provided they use the term respectfully. There is a difference between using it as a slur (as a noun) and using it as a correct description.

You're being willfully dense if you don't see why there's a problem with referring to people by a slur that they find offensive and have no desire to reclaim. If you call yourself queer, then of course you don't have a problem with it being used as "a correct description." But someone who does not think of themselves that way and has experience with the word being used as a violent slur against them by homophobes may not be comfortable with their community or lifestyle or relationships being called queer. You can't just tell those people "too bad, queer is so much cleaner as a catch-all so you'll have to get over yourself and accept that it's been reclaimed!"

[ SECRET POST #3177 ]

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