[ SECRET POST #3180 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3180 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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09. [WARNING for rape]



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10. [WARNING for rape]




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11. [WARNING for domestic violence/abuse]

[The Musketeers]


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12. [WARNING for rape]



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13. [WARNING for rape]

[Babylon 5]









Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #454.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

01. http://i58.tinypic.com/20t5tvl.jpg

[(Anonymous)]

My assumption is that this won't be an issue, because I'll be so worried about it being an issue that I'll set my expectations really low

[insanenoodlyguy]

Eh your not the first. From written word, porn, this fear is not uncommon. But you under estimate the excitement of being with someone. Odds are good if it's not working once your in real life this isn't the right person. Doesn't mean it won't suck! First times oft do. But you'll be okay once you get started. Plus there are many kinky sluts out there so find one that's yours!

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

I guess you know the last part from experience, huh?

I hope the OP finds someone s/he can actually trust...

(frozen comment)

[(Anonymous)]

what?

[(Anonymous)]

The good thing is, you're still a virgin so you have no idea how hot its going to get for you, it could very well knock your socks off (I hope it does, good sex is a wonderful thing), the bad thing is, with that attitude you're practically setting yourself up to fail.

[(Anonymous)]

tbh i suspect that the relief of dispelling the paralyzing fear that no one will ever find me attractive is going to pretty much overpower any other emotion

[(Anonymous)]

...saaaame.

[forgottenjester]

On one hand, fantasy will always be greater than reality. On the other hand, actually having sex is a whole different ballfield than just reading about it.

My advice, for what it's worth since I'm not a sex person, is to really just have fun with it when you start having sex. Don't try to have "the most ultimate sex ever" or "I'm gonna try to set some fucking guinness world record with my genitals". Just try to have fun, laugh, enjoy yourself. That makes the activity much more worth it.

[(Anonymous)]

Real sex is so different from fanfic sex that it's comparing oranges and, I don't know, pangolins. It's not even the same thing. Don't sweat it.

[forgottenjester]

I love pangolins. They're so cute.

[(Anonymous)]

This seems to sum up the situation perfectly!

[(Anonymous)]

I read a lot of fanfic porn years before I ever had sex, and yes, it's very different. However, that doesn't mean real sex is "bad", it's just...not like written sex at all. And it didn't stop me from enjoying unrealistic sex scenes in fic, either, I just acknowledge that it's not what it's really like.

[(Anonymous)]

Meh, it gave me just enough fake 'know how' that he didn't realize it was my first time. Mission accomplished.

Hey,you might find yourself realizing how ridiculously unrealistic some of the stuff you've read is (..like physically impossible. Or not THAT enjoyable at all, or that stuff that seems too vanilla in fic might actually be right up your alley)

[(Anonymous)]

I'm going to echo the others here. When I was a virgin, I loaded up on kinky, smutty stuff.

Friends told me that I wouldn't be so gutter-minded after I'd had sex.

Having sex just gave me experience to enrich my imagination.

Is real sex perfect? Not at all. There are going to be mishaps, farts, queefs, weird noises and expressions, but in the moment? I think a good partner is one who can laugh about the snafus.

It's kind of like the difference between watching a world-class chef prepare a dish (they make it look so easy/fun!) and trying to do so yourself.

[(Anonymous)]

I definitely agree that a fun sense of humor would be key to a good sexual experience with someone :). If nothing else, it's a great way to add to the intimacy and the bond.

[(Anonymous)]

'Real' sex is overrated. Try to relax and just enjoy whatever makes you happy- fantasy or otherwise.
(Note, if you're into harmful stuff, maybe keep that in fantasy?)

[(Anonymous)]

I've had sex. I've read fanfic. I much prefer fanfic.

[(Anonymous)]

This makes me sad. I hope you find a partner that you connect with on that level some day.

[(Anonymous)]

same here

[(Anonymous)]

I'm honestly surprised you're the only person to express this preference here. I have heard so, so many people (most of them women) say that sex has just never quite worked out for them.

Difficulty orgasming, difficulty getting turned on, vaginal pain regardless of prep, can't get wet enough and lube doesn't feel quite right, their partner is kind of obtuse about their pleasure, they have a difficult time feeling intimate with their partner while having sex. On and on and on. I know there are a lot of women who love sex and having amazing sex on the regular. But there are also a lot of women who rarely have sex that isn't meh.

And I mean, yeah, it sucks to not be "one of the lucky ones" for whom sex is amazing. But it bugs me when people act like it's not prevalent - as though women who enjoy their fantasies more than real life sex are this rare, unfortunate few. When I don't think they're not rare at all. Truth be told, I believe you're in quite good company, anon.

(FWIW, I'm autochorissexual, meaning I'm only ever aroused by fantasies of other people having sex. That's why I've used "they" and not "we" in this post when referring to women who have mainly mediocre experiences with sex. However, in a sense I suppose I could be considered the most extreme version of a person who prefers fanfic to actual RL sex.)

[(Anonymous)]

As a former virgin who read a lot of fic, I can tell you the real deal will be so much better than anything you've read. Just don't go doing the kinky stuff in the fics right away cos you might just freak your partner out. Trust me on this. Talk to them about it first and make sure you're being safe about it.

[(Anonymous)]

Real sex is not just about hotness, it's about doing an activity with someone you love that you both enjoy. It's not much like reading fanfic, so don't worry. Just remember to tell your partner what does and doesn't feel good, and ask them the same and don't just assume, because everyone likes different things.

[(Anonymous)]

it'll be different but still hot

[(Anonymous)]

Real sex requires actual communication as opposed to psychically intuiting what your partner wants. That's the biggest difference, imo...