[ SECRET POST #3212 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3212 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 027 secrets from Secret Submission Post #459.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Different anon, but, yes, this, and also, the scenario you are describing is extremely my shit

[(Anonymous)]

It's much rarer than the opposite, too. You see a lot of the submissive masochist feeling so bad and wrong and guilty for wanting to be hurt by their generic tall dark dominant partner who never has qualms about it, but you almost never see the perspective of the other side who feels bad and wrong for having a sadism kink and wondering if there's something wrong with them for having it!

[kallanda_lee]

It's much more common irl than in fic, tbh.

[(Anonymous)]

Yup. It's not uncommon in real life, it's rare in fiction. Whereas the quantity of secret submissive masochists in fiction is hugely disproportionate in the other direction to the number of them in real life.

[kallanda_lee]

I dunno, I keep hearing the subs outnumber the Dom(me)s at most events. It certainly seems to be that way in fandom, in my experience.

[(Anonymous)]

That can be true but that's only the kink community. I was talking about creepy people assuming all women secretly want alpha males or whatnot because all the fiction says so. In fiction it's almost ubiquitous, in real life absolutely not, you know

[kallanda_lee]

nah I know, and it's frustrating as hell.

same anon

[(Anonymous)]

Er not to imply that a sadism kinkis common IRL, I only meant it's not a rare thing.

Re: same anon

[kallanda_lee]

Honestly I think it's just even trickier to admit.

[(Anonymous)]

I think part of the disconnect there is that, as ever, most fic writers are women. In my experience, men are a lot more likely to have a guilt crisis over our sadistic fantasies. We're afraid of becoming rapists or abusers, or just being taken for those things. We're taught that violence is part of us, and we have to control it for our own safety and that of others.

Women are stereotyped as harmless, unable to offer any more harm to a man than slapping his face or pummeling ineffectually against his chest. It's harder to be afraid of really hurting someone when you've been taught that's impossible, you know?

[feotakahari]

I've seen this done with a couple of female characters, but it wasn't "am I a monster because I like spanking people?" so much as "am I a monster because I like shooting bad guys in the throat with a bow and arrow?" I guess the idea is that the character has already proved to herself that real violence is something she enjoys. (Steward of Song by Adam Stemple goes into detail with one of these arcs.)