[ SECRET POST #3357 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3357 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 078 secrets from Secret Submission Post #480.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

But if someone really can't feel romantic attraction, then why wouldn't they be happy with just friendship? I mean, they wouldn't know what romantic love felt like, so how could they miss it? That's the part I don't get. It's like... I'm allergic to pineapple. I've never had it before. I'm sure pineapple is great, but I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything because I don't have the experience of pineapple to compare the lack of pineapple to.

I guess I just don't understand it.

[(Anonymous)]

Unless you're living somewhere with very strange customs, there is no significant cultural pressure to eat pineapple. You're not constantly being told you're broken if you can't eat pineapple. People who don't eat pineapple aren't considered sad and pathetic, told they're always going to be alone and miserable, or treated like they're broken.

[(Anonymous)]

But if someone really can't feel romantic attraction, then why wouldn't they be happy with just friendship?

Well, I can't speak for OP, but speaking for myself, I think there are a couple of reasons. The first one being that I ship, so I do essentially experience what romantic attraction feels like. I simply experience it by proxy. Think about how you feel when you read a really great fic about your OTP, or watch a romantic movie that has you tied up in emotional knots. I'm going to presume it's not identical to the way you feel when you're falling for someone yourself, because it only makes sense that something happening in reality to you personally is different - perhaps milder but more nuanced all encompassing? - than something you are imagining and experiencing vicariously. But the basic emotions - attraction, fixation, pleasure - are there.

The second reason one might miss something one's never felt is because maybe for them it's a basic appetite. I mean, if you didn't have a mouth, would you still be hungry? Following that analogy, many (probably most) aro people are like people who don't have digestive tracts. They don't get hungry. But maybe some aro people have digestive tracts, they just don't have mouths. For them, the basic appetite is still there, they just aren't able to eat.

That's the way I am with sex and romantic love. I have an appetite, I just don't have any way of feeding it. Accept shipping. Yes it's odd, and it's not a particularly fun sexuality to have, but it's how I've always been.