fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3362 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3362 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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[10 Cloverfield Lane]

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[The Flash/DC Comics]

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08. [SPOILERS for Gravity Falls]

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09. [SPOILERS for Zootopia]

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10. [SPOILERS for Zootopia]

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11. [WARNING for rape]

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12. [WARNING for rape]

[Downton Abbey]

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13. [WARNING for dubcon/rape/etc]

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14. [WARNING for sexual assault]

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15. [WARNING for sexual assault]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #480.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

(Or rudeness, stupidity, etc.)

Kind of to go along with the mean spirited thread.

Is this a thing? I know when I'm mean, I mean to be mean. I may regret it later, but that doesn't mean it was unintentional at the time.

I wouldn't consider accidentally hurting someone as "being mean," it implies intent...

Basically every time I interact with someone.

I feel like I do this a lot because of my stupid mouth, which seems to have a mind of its own and that mind is really stupid.

One time (back in my younger years, when I still liked to read 'sporkings' of fanfiction), I made a judgey comment about Twilight. The usual stuff. I didn't realise the girl I was talking to LOVED Twilight and watched the movies. She didn't get mad, just quietly embarassed.

You know when you can see the happiness die in people's eyes? Yeah, it was like that. I felt absolutely awful.

Since then I've made a point of not judging other people's taste in media.

I've done that with Twilight. I think it's easy to forget, sometimes, that there's real people who really do things, if that makes sense?

Like when I told a librarian I hated the books. I think my reasoning was "well, she's a librarian so she should have taste."

It's easier to do that on the Internet. Create an echo chamber for yourself where you think everyone else has the same opinions you do.

It's also made me more aware of how... judgemental and awful nerd culture is.

Timely thread.

A co-worker came into my office to talk about addresses. People in the county are putting their addresses on pieces of paper and taping them to their mailboxes. This lasts as long as a good rainstorm and then the EMTs can't find their houses when they call for an ambulance.

I didn't know anything about this so I sent an e-mail to the list serve for my field asking if anybody had anything. My supervisor sees it.

1. He tells me there's been a law about addresses since the seventies. (I was not informed of this, and couldn't find any information about it, but ok)

2. He told me I was portraying the county as being hick, and he had worked so hard to make it nice and how dare I portray it like that, etc.

On one hand I'm upset because it seemed like he was genuinely hurt. On the other hand, every county in America likely has this problem. And I've talked to some other people and nobody could follow his logic where address issues=hick. It doesn't make sense.

I'm not sure if I was unintentionally mean, of if he's just an overly sensitive twit. Either way I left his office in tears.

He's being overly sensitive. It sounds like it's a vulnerable spot for him and anything that suggests county people are doing things wrong/inadequately is going to set him off and make him think they're being insulted as hickish.

I don't know what your boss is on about with his '70s address law, but I think he may be confused.

I do know what he's on about with the "hick" thing, but he's being very touchy. Address issues and and EMTs bring to mind folksy human interest pieces like this: http://articles.philly.com/1994-01-06/news/25823971_1_addresses-rural-counties-rural-residents

In the rural part of the county where my grandparents live, the address thing and the street re-naming for 911 is still an ongoing thing.

Around here, rural properties all have standardized reflective metal address signs out on the road. They're a lot easier to spot that a lot of addresses here in the city, where you have to squint at someone's unlit house numbers from the sidewalk like like some kind of creep.

and then there's the houses that DONT HAVE ANY NUMBERS PRESENT and it will be like 5 houses in a row so you'll realise you've gone too far, so backtrack but then again too far and you just kind of slowly narrow in on it and spot the tiny number hidden on the far right of the house behind a tree

My co-worker and I were chatting about beauty standards and stereotypes. I commented about how most blonde guys I had met were kind of smelly and I figured that it was because they knew they would be seen as attractive anyway so they didn't care about hygiene as much.

My co-worker, a guy on his forties who is almost bald with what's left of his hair being white, said "Well, I'm blonde" and I immediately said "You used to be, you mean".

He wasn't offended and there wasn't awkwardness or anything, but I thought it was mean and feel kinda bad whenever I remember it.

Edited 2016-03-19 02:21 (UTC)

I've told this one before, but once in high school when I was drunk at a party I told a guy in a wheelchair who was lamenting that he was still a virgin that he shouldn't worry as girls liked guys they could fix. I felt awful immediately afterwards, but he didn't really seem to notice/care though.

[ SECRET POST #3362 ]

Unintentional meanness

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