case: (Default)
Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2016-04-07 06:49 pm

[ SECRET POST #3382 ]


⌈ Secret Post #3382 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 093 secrets from Secret Submission Post #483.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
feotakahari: (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] feotakahari 2016-04-08 12:10 am (UTC)(link)
I learn what I've been taught, and people keep trying to teach me not to blame religion when a politician says that gay people are different from pedophiles because they're possessed by two different kinds of demons. You could frame that as petty if you wanted, and I guess that's a part of it--"See, I'm doing exactly what you tell me to, and following it through to its logical conclusion! Be annoyed at me!" But that implies insincerity, and just as I'm 100% sincere in thinking religion is fucking nuts, I'm 100% sincere in thinking it does a lot more good in the world than my own viewpoints have ever accomplished or likely ever will. I can't judge people based on what they think, no matter how crazy it seems to me, and I'm not enough of a hypocrite to apply that to some people but not others. And if thinking you're a cat is less "weird" than thinking an all-powerful being is watching over you, that's only because the world has normalized the latter so much.

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 12:14 am (UTC)(link)
So you're being a deliberately obtuse troll. In that case I'll stop wasting my time.
feotakahari: (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] feotakahari 2016-04-08 05:15 am (UTC)(link)
If I'm being obtuse, I promise it's not deliberate. I saw your post upthread about personal negative experience with soulbonding, and that's not something I can address. Your experiences are your own. But it seems like you're trying to frame me as completely unwilling to judge or recognize when something is dangerous or harmful, and you don't get to divide things that tidily. All I'm saying is that some otherkin aren't necessarily a threat, and I don't think that conflicts with everything you're saying about how and why otherkin in a position of power can pose a threat.

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 10:32 am (UTC)(link)
People who are disconnected enough with reality to think they are really not human at heart are absolutely a threat. That's not up for debate. You're free to disagree, and I'm free to find that alarming and avoid the hell out of you. The internet's funny like that.
feotakahari: (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] feotakahari 2016-04-08 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
If it counts for anything, I like you. I think you're an intelligent poster who often makes good points. I haven't had your life experiences, but I'm not your opponent in any practical terms.

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 05:31 pm (UTC)(link)
I appreciate that. But I refuse to stop seeing otherkin/fictionkin as threatening, because dismissing it as "oh well, whatever makes them happy" is exactly how I got sucked in and abused. I learned my lesson and refuse to be complacent when someone is completely dismissing verifiable reality.

That's where I draw the distinction between religion, and shit like this. Religion and faith are by definition unprovable one way or the other. You can't prove deities don't exist any more than people who worship them can prove they do. Thus, it's left up to faith, and nobody's getting hurt unless there is other abuse going on independent of the religion.

I CAN prove that people aren't wolves/panthers/unicorns/gryphons/etc. I CAN prove that the person I'm talking to isn't a character from Homestuck/Undertale/Steven Universe/FF7/etc. People who choose to dismiss verifiable reality in favor of believing their escapist delusion are dangerous to me for the same reason someone following me down the street at night is dangerous; call it Schroedinger's Abuser. They haven't attacked me yet, but I'm not sticking around long enough to find out if they will.
arcadiaego: Grey, cartoon cat Pusheen being petted (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] arcadiaego 2016-04-08 09:57 pm (UTC)(link)
People who are disconnected enough with reality to think they are really not human at heart are absolutely a threat. That's not up for debate.

People with mental illness are statistically more likely to be the victim of crime than the perpetrators. Saying all otherkin are dangerous is a worrying generalisation for me, because in that case how do we tackle it?
Edited 2016-04-08 21:58 (UTC)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 10:26 pm (UTC)(link)
We don't. We avoid them. Walk away. Do not engage. No contact.

Nobody can "tackle" someone with a mental illness until that person decides they want help. Until then, the most we can do is not supply them with fresh victims.
arcadiaego: Grey, cartoon cat Pusheen being petted (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] arcadiaego 2016-04-08 10:33 pm (UTC)(link)
Most people with mental illness are not ensnaring 'fresh victims'. We're mostly just trying to survive. And I'm sure lots of people who buy into the otherkin stuff are just doing it as a bizarre hobby rather than out of some psychological problem. I'd rather raise awareness of cult-like behaviour than tar an entire community with the same brush and risk people not wanting to talk to others about what's going on.

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm not talking about "most people with mental illness." Those who buy into otherkin just as an odd hobby are also not who I'm talking about (I don't even consider them otherkin). I'm talking specifically about people who sincerely believe they are not human. Those people are inherently dangerous and should be avoided at all costs.

Because when you seriously consider yourself something other than a human being, you are no longer beholden to a moral imperative to not hurt other people. This is exactly the argument that I've seen fictionkin/otherkin use, by the way; that their morals are dictated not by the human society in which they live, but the animal or fictional character they believe they are.

You and I are under no obligation whatsoever to be someone else's savior or therapist (especially if they soundly refuse to get help, like the ones I dealt with). It's taken way too long to learn that boundary, and based on my past experience with an abusive fictionkin clique -- one that I'm in therapy from, right now -- that is one wall I've decided to put up. The minute somebody mentions they are otherkin, fictionkin, or a "multiple system" I will drop contact immediately and block them if I'm able. No exceptions.

There is nothing wrong with looking out for your own safety and wellbeing. Absolutely nobody has the right to compromise that.
arcadiaego: Grey, cartoon cat Pusheen being petted (Default)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] arcadiaego 2016-04-08 11:42 pm (UTC)(link)
We seem to be at cross purposes - I'm talking about fandom's reaction to otherkin, while you're talking about your own personal choices and experiences. I'm not volunteering to be anyone's therapist, just throwing theories out there about whether fandom's behaviour is currently helpful or not.

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

[personal profile] lady_dragoon 2016-04-08 11:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I really doubt there's any way for fandom to be helpful to them; you can only help someone with a mental illness if they personally want to get better. And the majority of otherkin/fictionkin I've run into don't. Either they're not really otherkin at heart and participate in it as a harmless hobby, or they're perfectly content being delusional and abusive. I think it's far healthier for fandom to avoid the daylights out of these people. There's way less chance of anybody getting hurt that way.
Edited 2016-04-08 23:48 (UTC)

Re: I really don't draw a distinction

(Anonymous) 2016-04-08 08:34 pm (UTC)(link)
if thinking you're a cat is less "weird" than thinking an all-powerful being is watching over you, that's only because the world has normalized the latter so much.

I completely agree with you on this point.