Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2016-04-22 06:46 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2016-04-22 06:46 pm
[ SECRET POST #3397 ]
⌈ Secret Post #3397 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
01.
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02.
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03.
[The Mystery Skulls, "Magic", animatic by the artist yuramec/yuracon seen here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TqfBEX6QtE]
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04. [SPOILERS for Sleepy Hollow]
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05. [SPOILERS for Gravity Falls]
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06. [WARNING for discussion of abusive relationships]
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07. [WARNING for discussion of rape]
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08. [WARNING for discussion of rape/pedophilia]
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09. [WARNING for violence/gore]
[Spartacus: Blood and Sand]
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10. [WARNING for violence/gore/death]
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11. [WARNING for sexual abuse]
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12. [WARNING for racism]
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13. [WARNING for discussion of child porn]
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14. [WARNING for discussion of rape]
Notes:
Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 000 secrets from Secret Submission Post #485.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
Re: Impotent husband leaves after fight over sex YAY
(Anonymous) 2016-04-23 11:37 am (UTC)(link)No one yet has mentioned the part about you (at some point) telling him you prefer sex with penetration - it sounds like some or a lot of your husband's sexual anxiety may be hinging on that, or a related assumption that he can't satisfy you sexually as he is. It sounds like he may feel like there's no point to being physically intimate with you unless penetration is involved, because he believes that's the only way he can sexually satisfy you. In response, he is probably avoiding sexual interaction if he feels like won't be able to 'perform', because avoidance is easier to deal with then a partner's later disappointment and/or rejection. If this is the case, you may need to spend some time rebuilding his confidence in sexually satisfying you non-penetratively. If he feels more confident in your satisfaction with a vibrator, you could consider it for his sake.
I think a trained therapist is really the best person to talk to you about this. But I think there are a few questions to ask yourself first:
1. Are you willing to stay with your husband if you will never (or very infrequently) have PIV sex again?
2. If so, what type of sexual interaction would you find satisfying?
3. If not, but you want to stay with your husband, is an open relationship an option?
It sounds like a difficult time for both of you. But, if you can get through it, it might be an opportunity to connect on a deeper sexual level.
/someone in a sexual, non PIV LTR