fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3493 ]

[ SECRET POST #3493 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3493 ⌋

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So, it seems I became friends with an 18-year-old. I'm 35. Logically, I wouldn't even think I'd get on with someone that young, but lo and behold, I do. He's very smart and talks about interesting stuff. Yeah, he is a bit immature on some levels, but not to the level it would bother me. Lord only knows why he likes me, I didn't know I was cool with the young ones (he might think I'm younger than I am, but still). Anyway...is this weird? Ant caveats? I'm just sort of going with the flow here.

It's unusual, but not that weird. When I was in college there'd be older students in my class, and we'd be friends by definition. I also had fandom friends about that age difference when I was eighteen, although maybe it's a little different online.

No. It's not weird. Unless you actually want to fuck him. Then its only weird that you're flailing g about friendship.

No, that would be weird. Also I have a boyfriend, and he's gay, afaik.

It's fine. I tend to get on more with people who are younger or older for some reason. Older people have life experience, and younger people often have a sort of energy and open mindedness that makes me like talking to them.

I don't get people who always mock older or younger people. Like older people are all dull bigots (not necessarily true) and younger people are dumb entitled brats who need to "get off someone's lawn."

Honestly I think it's the energy? When I'm surrounded by people my age, half of the time they feel "older" than me. Like, sort of burned out? That drags me down, and I really enjoy being around people who are excited about things.

To be honest I do feel weird about friendships with much younger people but my attitude is sort of, it's not their fault that im feeling weird about it, so no sense punishing them for it.

I've probably also feel weird about that. I mean, he's legally an adult, and I don't think there's anything inherently objectionable with the relationship as long as it isn't sexual. And friendship can have many forms, for sure. Still, I think if it were me I'd try to keep some boundaries. idk not saying don't be friends at all, by any means, just remember that you are the adult in the relationship and he's still a kid, and try not to lose that perspective.

One of my best friends when I was 12-14 was a 35-37 year old woman. We met through a roleplaying game where I roleplayed her adopted niece. There was nothing very weird about it since it never got beyond being friends.

I have a crush on a 19 year old. But she's smart and funny and cute. But vegan.

But I enjoy her company so much.

I'm
Going with the friendship flow for now XD

Friendships are friendships. I've had a lot of older or younger friends, mostly people I met through work.

Again, unusual, but not too weird. I'm friends with people who are older than my parents and go out to dinner with them every so often.

Just go with the flow and see what happens.

I don't think it's unusual.

Why are you asking us if it's weird? Like... is something off? Are you doubting the motivation behind the reason you're friends with this person? Is it a real friendship, or is there some kind of coercion going on?

I'm not sure why you'd be asking this unless you were already aware of something not quite being right about the situation.

I'm casually friends with people up to seven years younger than me, and I've never found it weird in the slightest, so maybe you should be asking yourself why you feel the need to justify your choices.

It's not particularly weird imo, especially online where people see your words before anything else.
Age isn't a guaranteed marker for maturity, and vice versa. And sometimes you have enough in common that age differences don't have much influence.

I'd say it'd help to keep in mind that he's in a different place wrt life experience than you, when it becomes relevant, though.

It's not weird, but due to past awful friendships with people way younger than me, I refuse to engage in any kind of close friendship with people under 25.

IDK, I definitely think it's possible to be friends across age groups (but important to set boundaries with people who are actually minors or who are immature enough to not be functional adults). I am friends with many people both younger and older than me. With romance I'm very strict about being in my age range; with platonic relationships? IDGAF as long as I like them and we get along and have some things in common

I have had friendships with people up to ten years younger than me. All I really have to say is to understand that they are younger, give them leeway when they do something you think is immature, and act as gentle guide to more mature action, without being pushy.

it's not weird. I'm 54 and most of my friends are in their 30s or younger.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #3493 ]

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