[ SECRET POST #3510 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3510 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Stephen King]


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03.
[John Green]


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04.
[American Gods]


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05.
[Charlie Hunnam in King Arthur: Legend of the Sword]


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06.
[Penn & Teller: Fool Us]


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07.
[Steven Universe]


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08.
[Questionable Content]


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09.
[Ghostbusters 2016]











Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 53 secrets from Secret Submission Post #502.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Well, everyone is talking about Shakespeare in general making more sense in performance than on the page, and it's true that helps. But here, have a Macbeth synopsis (aka summary):

There's a bunch of Scottish clan chiefs/earls/petty nobles (aka thanes) ruled by King Duncan. Scotland is at war with Norway. Two of these chiefs are Macbeth, whose lands are called Glamis, and Banquo. They're friends, and they've just finished kicking the butts of some invading Norwegians and mercenaries when the play starts and they run into three witches, who greet Macbeth by going "hey, you, thane of Cawdor!"

And Macbeth is like, "you got the wrong guy, I'm thane of Glamis." And the witches are all "that's what you think. And you're gonna be king, too."

And Banquo's like "yeah? What about me?"

And the witches go "well, good news, bad news. You're not gonna be king. But all your descendants are."

And Macbeth and Banquo are like "right, uh huh..." until the witches vanish into thin air and then they're all "WTF? Where'd the ugly creeps go?"

So they meet up with some of King Duncan's other retainers, who go "hey Macbeth, for your loyal service, you get to be thane of Cawdor. The old one's still alive, but not for long, he was working with the Norwegians."

And Macbeth and Banquo are like "oh shit."

And then they meet up with King Duncan, who goes "and my son's gonna be my heir."

So Banquo's kind of like "tough luck, can't win 'em all, buddy."

And Macbeth is like "okay, brain, I do not like the way you went straight to 'murder the king and take his throne.' Shut the hell up, brain."

And then he writes to his wife and says "the king's coming to visit and also some creepy witches who can apparently see the future said I'll be king."

And when her husband comes home, Lady Macbeth's like "okay go kill Duncan."

And Macbeth's like "um, uh, I, uh--"

And Lady Macbeth is all "I didn't realize I married such a cowardly weakling."

So Macbeth goes to kill Duncan. Along the way, he hallucinates a bloody dagger pointing the way to Duncan's room.

After Macbeth kills Duncan and Duncan's grooms/servants, Duncan's sons run for it and Macbeth blames them so he can crown himself King of Scotland.

And then everything goes to shit.

Macbeth gets crazy paranoid and starts hallucinating more. He has Banquo killed and tries to have his kid killed so Banquo's kids won't take the throne from him like the witches implied they would, but the kid gets away.

Natural disasters, weird weather, and general nasty creepy shit (Duncan's horses eat each other) happen all over Scotland, basically proving that Macbeth's not fit to be king. Lady Macbeth starts hallucinating and sleepwalking too--that's where the famous "out, out, damned spot!" thing comes from, she sees blood all over her hands all the time.

Macbeth meets up with the witches again who (he thinks) tell him he's invincible, since "no man of woman born" can kill him, and he won't be defeated "until Birnum Wood come to Dunsinane"--until a forest gets up and walks, basically. Macbeth kills another noble's entire family.

Whoops. That noble dude? His name's MacDuff, and he was born via C-section from his dead mom's body. And he and Duncan's sons and a bunch of other Scottish nobles and their soldiers march on Macbeth's castle fortifications at Dunsinane. Along the way, they pass through Birnum Wood. Malcolm, Duncan's rightful heir, says "hey how about all our soldiers cut some branches and hold them up while we march so Macbeth's forces can't get an accurate count of our men?"

Then, while Macbeth is trying to rally his forces, there's a bunch of screaming--Lady Macbeth killed herself, and a messenger comes in and goes "you're not gonna believe this, but we're being attacked by a bunch of walking trees."

And Macbeth goes "fuck it, if I'm gonna die, I'm taking everybody I can with me," and goes out to fight.

He kills a guy, but then he runs into MacDuff. Macbeth goes "fuck off I've killed the rest of your family already and also I can't be killed by anyone born of woman," and attacks MacDuff.

MacDuff cuts off Macbeth's head and brings it to Malcolm, who becomes the new King of Scotland. And that's all, folks.

[(Anonymous)]

Yes good 10/10 synopsis. :)