[ SECRET POST #3518 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3518 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Star Trek: Voyager]


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03.
[Voltron]


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04.
[Up the Women]


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05.
[Digimon Adventure 02]


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06.
[Assassin's Creed: Syndicate]


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07.
[The Sims]


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08.
[The X-Files]


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09.
[Letterkenny, Stewart/Katy]












Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 49 secrets from Secret Submission Post #503.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Things you want to tell people but can't

[(Anonymous)]

AYRT

Having a relationship doesn't make it any better IME. I end up feeling bad about not being physically attracted to the person I'm in the relationship with. Then doubly bad when the feeling of wanting a fulfilling sexual relationship with someone I find physically attractive doesn't go away. I worry that it straddles the line between cheating or not cheating, but I don't think it ever will be, because I don't think 'someone I find physically attractive' will ever happen. I literally cannot imagine that person.

It doesn't help when friends talk about their relationships and how someone they're seeing is so hot or so good in bed and how compatible they are, and it's like hearing everyone talk about a movie that's so amazing and when you get in the theater to see it, it bores you and only you to tears and you can't get into it and you have no idea why. I wish I could enjoy the movie too.

I use shipping as a vicarious outlet because it's easy to imagine other people's or character's feelings or attraction toward each other, but as soon as it becomes Character/You or Character/Reader it loses all appeal to me.

Re: Things you want to tell people but can't

[(Anonymous)]

I definitely know what you mean with pretty much all of this.

Personally, I'm aro as well as ace, so we're not in exactly the same boat. But like many ace people I've certainly contemplated what options may be open to me. And I'm reasonably decent looking, so I've had a few male friends who have been interested in pursuing a romantic, intimate relationship with me. Some of them have also talked about their willingness to work around the whole sex aspect if I don't want sex. But the idea of it just hurts to contemplate.

And even if I was a romantic ace, I think I would still struggle with it (maybe I would give relationships my best shot, and maybe I would even find one that worked for me, and there's nothing at all wrong with doing that, but I can see how it would be tricky, is all I'm saying). Because how do you look at someone you care about, who cares about you but who also desires you, and say, I will never want you in a sex way. I will never lust after you. You will never truly get me hot. And say it in a way that will adequately convince them.

If I was a non-ace person, I couldn't handle knowing that the person I was into would never look at me and just want me sexually. Not if I truly understood and believed that never means never and they weren't going to change for me if I was patient enough.

Ugh, sorry. I'm bringing myself down with this, and I don't want to make you feel worse. All I really mean to say is that navigating this kind of stuff when you're ace is tricky as fuck and can sometimes be really discouraging and I get that, I empathize big time.

it's like hearing everyone talk about a movie that's so amazing and when you get in the theater to see it, it bores you and only you to tears and you can't get into it and you have no idea why. I wish I could enjoy the movie too.

Yeah. To follow your movie analogy, I think a lot of people presume ace people just aren't interested in movies. And that's true of a lot of ace people. But there are also ace people who would fucking love to watch a good movie - our brains just don't seem to be wired in a way that allows us to be entertained by movies.

It's a Midas touch kind of deal.

I use shipping as a vicarious outlet because it's easy to imagine other people's or character's feelings or attraction toward each other, but as soon as it becomes Character/You or Character/Reader it loses all appeal to me.

This truth. I love shipping, but holy shit do I not want to be any part of it on a personal level. I do not want to have sex with the characters as myself. I do not want to imagine I am either of the characters while they have sex with each other. I do not want to imagine I am voyeuristically watching them get it on. I just want them to have awesome sex, and I can imagine it, and eat it up, and love it. Lol.