fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #3651 ]

[ SECRET POST #3651 ]

⌈ Secret Post #3651 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 03 pages, 52 secrets from Secret Submission Post #522.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That's it? That should be ridiculously easy to do on yourself.

You could accomplish your hair goal just by gathering it into a ponytail tied off at about the length you're looking for with a hair tie around the bottom to act as a gauge. Then just chop the whole thing off an inch or so below the desired length, and do an all over trim afterward to get any uneven bits or strands you may have missed.

Bam. Not an overly fancy cut, but you will have managed to do exactly what you wanted.

NO PLEASE DON'T DO THIS. I have no personal problem with you, Herpy, but oh my gosh doing this will create more than just a tiny bit of uneven length. Overdirecting the hair causes MASSIVE changes in length from back to front.

I'm going to respectfully suggest that as a cosmetologist, I don't doubt your word, but that maybe to most non-cosmetologists, the less-than-professional result cutting your hair isn't really the huge tragedy that you seem to view it as.

I totally get that, believe me, but trust me when I say that cutting a ponytail to get a straight line actually is that big of a deal. Like 'up to a four inch difference in length from the back to the front' kind of a big deal depending on your hair.

EDIT to clarify: Also, while I actually do see some pretty horrible hair cuts that the people in question don't have a problem with (I have cut a mullet intentionally, worst day ever), particularly with home jobs, I am still being slightly over the top for effect and not 'no if you cut your hair at home I WILL LITERALLY DIE'

Edited 2017-01-01 22:15 (UTC)

But you went full capslock even without knowing what technique OP was considering. I'm not sure exaggerating "for effect" is really helpful. Why not just be honest and more accurate about the possible repercussions?

I went full capslock on the ponytail technique saying please don't do this but elsewhere I left detailed instructions on the best way to cut your hair at home so I think I achieved 'honest and accurate' there.

As for why? Because honestly it's been a really long time since I was on FS and I'm tired and have an aggressive need for people to like me and I figured if I played up 'melodramatic overreaction' (from my perspective it was clear, so I thought everyone else knew too, so my fault but that was where I was coming from) it would look less like 'snooty hairstylist wants you to pay money' and more like 'professional who can goof around' and did I mention I am tired bcause I don't think I'm making sense even here.

Nope. Look at your very first comment to OP's original post:

"I am a cosmetologist and PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS. PLEASE."

I don't mean to pick on you, honestly. But I think that if what you want is for people NOT to assume you're warning OP off purely because of your bias as a stylist, then deliberately exaggerating your reaction is not the most effective approach because it usually achieves the opposite.

Maybe it's me, but if I had a papercut, I'd side eye a doctor who went "OMG NOOOOOO YOU NEED TO CALL AN AMBULANCE RIGHT NOW. PLEASE. PLEASE DON'T ATTEMPT TO CLEAN AND BANDAGE THIS YOURSELF." I'd place more trust and credibility in a doctor who very sensibly advised me to clean it gently with a mild soap and water, then maybe some antibiotic ointment if I had any, then a band-aid.

That was the 'being melodramatic' capslock. It's also one line, and I immediately go on to say 'but actually I get why you would do this at home so here's what you should keep in mind' and then I gave not one but two seperate comments full of detailed advice.

I feel like papercut is kind of a vast oversimplification but I can't really think of a comparable medical thing.

" But I think that if what you want is for people NOT to assume you're warning OP off purely because of your bias as a stylist, then deliberately exaggerating your reaction is not the most effective approach because it usually achieves the opposite. "

I'm gonna blame that squarely on 'it seemed like a good idea at the time because I was tired.'

for not trying to pick on them you're doing a really good job

NAYRT - Maybe they shouldn't indulge in unnecessary hyperbole about how disastrous it is to cut your own hair while trying to use their position as stylist to establish a false sense of authority, then.

Not everyone can afford to go to a proper stylist for a haircut. It's not the end of the world if you have a relatively simple look in mind (such as straight and shoulder length, like the OP said) and want to give it a go at home. Will it look like you had it done in a salon? Probably not. But presumably OP isn't a dimwit and knows that already.

WE GET IT, YOU HATE CAPSLOCK

For like the four millionth time, I don't think OP is an idiot, which is why I gave then detailed instructions. I was tired and thought it would come across as funny.

It's absolutely fine to call me out on my bullshit but when I say "oops that wasn't what I was going for, you're right that looks bad sorry," it's time to let it go!

So are you still trying to claim that you weren't picking on nonnymouscawitz, here, or have you progressed to just trying to justify picking on them? Because you're still doing it and it's obnoxious. They didn't say anything that deserved the kind of hostility you're displaying.

And I don't have any personal problem with you, but acting like people are too incompetent to trim their own hair when it's at shoulder length is kind of laughable.

So I hate text instead of chat but as I clarified in my other comment, I am being slightly melodramatic on purpose. Apologies, I think I'm funny but no one else does, not even my friends, so you are not alone!

But I don't think anon is incompetent. I gave them detailed instructions on the best way to cut your hair. But pulling your hair into a ponytail to cut it is something I have actually done. Recently, for a donation. And for what anon wants, one length at their shoulders, cutting that way is going to give them the complete opposite result. Pulling the hair back towards the back for a ponytail means you're overdirecting the hair, creating more length in the front. The back pieces would have very choppy layering from gathering in the ponytail and the front pieces would be noticibly, dramatically longer, more like an angled bob than a one length cut. So it sounds like an easy way to achieve the result, but would actually create more work.

Well... see, I think we're coming at this solution from different angles. I respect your training, definitely. I'm quite sure you can give a better haircut on another person than I can (although I do pretty routinely cut and color other people's hair I'm definitely an amateur).

From a DIY first timer perspective (I've literally been cutting my own hair for about ten years now), getting a reasonably even length all around is going to be hard if you try to free hand it. I know the ponytail method is going to result in a longer front and shorter back, but it's a lot easier to deal with extra length in the front than it is in the back.

Anyway tl;dr I get where you're coming from now and I hope you also see my side of the coin.

Yeah, explained that way I see it. I just worried without that clarification anon was going to try the ponytail method expecting an easy straight cut and I panicked a bit. I really, really should not be typing detailed nonsense when I haven't slept much, but I saw the question and I was like 'YES THIS IS THE ONE THING I AM GOOD AT I CAN CONTRIBUTE GIVE ME POSITIVE ATTENTION.' It's been that kind of week.

So hey who wants to start and over/under on how weird and uneven Herpy's hair looks?

I am really tired and I'm not sure if it looks like I'm snapping at you or not (I swear I'm not) so I'm just going to apologize anyway just in case. I am trying to be friendly, not irritating, but I am having some major focus issues so I think I'm failing.

Hey, stop beating yourself up. That one anon with the capslock was being an overly nitpicky ass. Fwiw I thought your advice was helpful AND I DON'T SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH USING CAPS TO EMPHASIZE STUFF.

Thank you. Last night I really needed a confidence booster so I was super excited to aee topics about hair and then when I screwed that up it was just a bad night all around so irs nice to have someone in my corner.

you are right about the ponytail thing. I cut off my ponytail in a fit of teenage angst once, and my only choice for fixing it was to get an A bob. I remember the hair stylist being exasperated with me for doing it lmao.

Yeahhh.... I have seen a small handful of 'thanks I did it myself' that looked just like it was done in a salon (and, to be fair, a few 'a STYLIST did this to you???' cuts/colors), but often I am not surprised when someone says they cut their own hair, because I've already seen the evidence. The ponytail thing drives every stylist I know nuts because it's so common. We do it for donation because you have to keep the hair together, but then it's such a pain to fix the cut, and now there are all these 'save money!' 'Stylists HATE her!' tutorials out there revolving around one or multiple ponytails. Overdirection is really easy to get wrong.

I've done the teenage angst cuts too, though! from past my shoulders to a chin bob in my bathroom, no idea how I didn't mangle that.

I cut my hair this way (because I'm cheap) and the other commenter is right: it will be uneven. But uneven with no split ends, which is what I'm going for since I usually braid or pin up my hair when I'm doing 'tidy'.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

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