Let me be the first person to actually address your point: Yeah, I, too, hate it if the female in any ship is treated like some kind of prize for the male. Although I don't think that this attitude is very rampant among Ulquihime fans. I'd be lying if I said that I never encountered it, but I think that those people are in a minority.

Other than that, like you I'm sitting on pins and needles whenever I think of what will happen once the main story continues. Personally I don't think that they will hook up *sobs* (I suspect that if any 'Hime ship will be canonized it'll be Ishihime), but if Ulqui dies there'll be many, many resurrection fics coming and I'd rather avoid that.