[ SECRET POST #3718 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3718 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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02.
[Criminal Minds, Stephen Walker]


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04.
[Death in Paradise, Humphrey/Florence]


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05.
[The NeverEnding Story]


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06.
[Beyoncé]


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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #531.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

I am 29 and still can't drive. It is hindering my life. But I am TERRIFIED of driving. I have had a permit before and driven 2-3 hours. I am thinking of paying fora driving instructor but that will cost a lot of money.

Do you think a professional would be able to calm my fears or only a therapist?

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

It depends on the nature of your fears. A driving instructor will be cheaper than therapy though, so I would try that first - maybe seek out one that is understanding, if you can.

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

If you can afford it, get both.

Re: Driving Phobias

[soldatsasha]

Depends on the nature of the phobia, I'd think?

If your fear has a more realistic rational basis, like you feel that your inexperience makes you a dangerous driver who might cause accidents, then taking driving lessons might help a lot along with simply getting more experience driving.

But, if your fear is mostly an instinctual irrational thing, like being terrified of clowns, then a driving instructor might not be able to help and you'd probably be better off saving up more money to see a shrink.

If it helps to hear someone else's personal experience- I have a lot of anxiety about driving despite doing it all the time as a huge part of my job. Partly it's that I have a very hard time judging speeds and distances, and partly it's a social thing in that I feel like other drivers are judging me or getting angry at me for doing the speed limit or something. I never really "got over" this, but eventually I drove enough that I got to the point where I could tune it out enough to function.

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

A therapist might help, but what it really sounds like you need is practice. It's normal to be terrified behind the wheel until you really just get the movements and mindset in your head, and it sounds like you've had a long time to work it up in your head. I think a driving instructor with some patience would be helpful. If you are able, have them take you out to really really residential or country roads where there isn't going to be any traffic. Or a big empty parking lot, and start from square one.

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

I feel you, but mine's diagnosed as mild PTSD. I was in a wreck soon after getting my permit as a passenger, looking forward when the person stopped short on icy streets. So I get behind the wheel and that's all I see, for some reason. It sucks and is hella inconvenient.

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

I'm 33 and can't drive, which mostly sucks for me because what would be a 30 minute commute by car can become a two hour by bus or take a cab commute. Also, anything I can't carry I have to have delivered, which is expensive and I'm poor. But I'm terrified of driving because my response time sucks. As a teen, I only had one behind the wheel lesson, after which my driving instructor took my parents aside and said I should never drive and she'd never seen anyone so bad at it. But everybody expects you to drive to be an adult, so I spent several years getting my learner's permit over and over, until I could go about 30mph without whatever poor bastard who was in the passenger seat trying to bail. But I eventually gave up, because it was too nerve wracking for me and whoever else was in the car.

I realize this may not be great news from where you are, but then again, even I never killed or hurt anyone despite my driving instructor refusing to ever get in the car with me again. I'd say at least try with an instructor and start in a big parking lot so there's nothing to hit. Good luck!

Re: Driving Phobias

[(Anonymous)]

As someone who got their license late because I was so scared of driving, the only thing that makes you less afraid of driving is to actually *drive*. It doesn't have to be in heavy traffic or on the freeway - just plot out a course to the local shops or around quiet suburbia, and drive it over and over again until you get more relaxed. And then slowly widen your driving field.

I still don't like driving, especially when I'm unfamiliar with where I'm going, but at least now local driving doesn't utterly terrify me. People who are good at driving are good because they've been doing it for years. It just takes time and a lot of practice to get comfortable with it.