[ SECRET POST #3931 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3931 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #563.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[thewakokid]

Not what I mean. You can not act like an asshole, sure, but if you're still an asshole on this inside, you think assholish things, hold assholish opinions or values, have assholish gut reactions, if you and the person you're confiding in knows you're an asshole on the inside behind the attempts to present a better human face, that's what I'm talking about.

Like, think about just about opinion I've ever given here that made you think "Man, what a piece of shit" It could be that I try very hard so that the opinion doesn't affect how respectfully I treat people in the real word... Does that magically make me not an asshole to you?

I can't remember who it was, but there was a philosopher who held the view that some people are just good by nature and will go to heaven no matter what they do in life, and that some people are just bad by nature and will go to hell no matter what they do in life. I don't hold with that at all, but the idea stands when it comes to whether you're an asshole or not. Some people are just assholes, dont matter how they act, they're assholes all the way to the centre.

[sockes]

Are you thinking of John Calvin and Calvinism? If so, his philosophy was less that some people are naturally good/naturally evil, but rather that some people have been chosen by God to be saved or damned, regardless of their actions. I'm probably not representing that with the nuance it deserves, but that's the most basic idea.

For me, whether I would consider a person in the scenario you put forward to be an asshole depends on why they were censoring themselves. If they know that inside they're an asshole and they deliberately try not to act like one because they don't want to hurt people, then I would consider that a lot better than someone who doesn't act like an asshole for self-centered reasons.

We can't help our first, kneejerk reactions to things, but we can control what we do after that, and I do think that it's possible to alter your initial reaction given enough time and effort.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think that it's the case that people are assholes on the inside and there's an end on it. At least not most people - and nothing that I've seen you do or say on here makes me think that you're an exception in that respect. I think an enormous amount of that stuff is a result of the choices that we make and the attitudes that we adopt. It's not just, I'm an asshole on the inside, end of story. I think, to be honest, that's a form of evasion to avoid trying to be better to people.

Certainly, from everything that I've seen you say on here, I don't think that you're intrinsically an asshole at all. You don't have to be an asshole if you don't want to be one. Not just in how you act but in who you are. It's hard work trying to be decent but I think it's within your powers.