[ SECRET POST #3959 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #3959 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 35 secrets from Secret Submission Post #567.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

06. https://i.imgur.com/CcNycEO.png

[(Anonymous)]

I feel this.

[(Anonymous)]

Don't feel bad, OP. Kudos to hits ratio have no bearing whatsoever on quality. I've seen terrible fics get a lot of kudos and fantastic fics get not many.

Out of interest, I just went into archiveofmyown and looked at the kudos to hits of fics that I have been reading. Most fics that I consider of high quality garnered a 6% kudos to hits ratio at best. This was across a lot of different fandoms.

Most people on the internet lurk, hence will not bother hit the kudos button. The same reason why most people who view a youtube video won't hit the 'like' button, even if they like the video.

Finally, popularity is in no way indicative of quality. Look at 50 Shades of Gray. Terrible book but she was smart enough to build a following based off Twilight (IMO another terrible book.)

[(Anonymous)]

...does anyone even get those numbers these days?

[(Anonymous)]

maybe, like, a single chapter story by a very popular writer?
otherwise, i doubt it.

[(Anonymous)]

Yes?

My main fandom is good to me. Also, low general hits, but my small fandom/original stuff generally gets a good ratio.

I... write summaries indicative of the work, I guess.

[(Anonymous)]

Everything in my fandom that meets basic standards of literacy gets >10%, I thought that was pretty standard. Sucks if people can't even get that anymore.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't get the relationship between a good hit/kudo ratio and "fandom friends."

I don't consider people who click a button on a story a friend; they are a reader.
I don't even consider people who comment on a fic as friends. They are reviewers.

For me, friends are people with whom I have had extended, reciprocal interactions with over a period of time.

[(Anonymous)]

+1

[(Anonymous)]

This.

[(Anonymous)]

So, correct me if I misunderstand, OP, but what you seem to be saying is, "I hate all these people because they're better, more popular writers than I am! I'm so jealous that I'm going to sit here and seethe, rather than ever actually working on my writing skills!"

Is that, uh, what you were trying to say there? Because that's certainly how I'm reading this secret.

[(Anonymous)]

Ok, first of all, you're wrong, OP doesn't say they hate anyone. OP says they feel jealous. OP also says they feel bitter. And if you actually pay attention to the secret, you'll notice that OP admits to feeling bitter about their own shortcomings as a writer. So according to the secret, OP's bitterness isn't even directed at other people; it's directed at themself.

Second of all, it's not like OP is trying to argue that their feelings are totally rational and justified, here. Judging by the way they phrased their secret, they're pretty clearly owning up to the fact that their feelings aren't something they're proud of or feel self-righteous about. But it's how they feel, nonetheless. Hence, they've made a secret about it.

Honestly, your response seems kind of mean. OP has admitted to feeling inferior as a writer, and to feeling unable to change that. And there you are, being all passive-aggressively judgey, and putting words in their mouth to boot.

[(Anonymous)]

+1

[(Anonymous)]

That’s exactly what I took from this secret, too.

[killertofuuu]

Not OP, but I'll correct you. You're putting words in OP's mouth and reading into a sentiment that might not even be there, making the conclusion you've drawn invalid.

Also, are you even a writer? Because I don't think you understand how painfully common it is for writers, even excellent ones, to experience insecurity and self-loathing over their own work, and how often we compare ourselves to others without even realizing it. We are often our own worst enemies.

[(Anonymous)]

Have you tried writing gen? Seriously, that's pretty much all I write, and I generally get a decent hits to kudos ratio. I think it has to do with most fics in my fandom being shippy (so people who want something different are more likely to give kudos) and being in the fandom a while. Idk, you could give that a shot.

[(Anonymous)]

OP, it sounds to me as though you have two issues here. Both are painful. Both are things I can empathize with, because I've been there ( well, tbh, I'm STILL there)

The first is your envy of other writers, and your feelings of inadequacy. The solution to this, as you know, is just to keep writing what you enjoy and posting it. If either the writing or the posting stops being fun, stop doing it.

The second, the hunger for fandom friends, is harder to deal with. All I can say is that some fandoms and fandom spaces are more conductive than others, and the people too. Comment on fics you like (even ask questions of the author?) and slowly, over time, you'll find good people to talk to.

[killertofuuu]

+1

[(Anonymous)]

But are you like a super good writer? Because if not then it's fine and logical that you don't have much kudos. Do you want to be a super good writer? Because it takes a lot of works. <-- this reasoning helped me get over my envy and disapoinment. I became a happier fic writer.

[(Anonymous)]

This is good advice.

[killertofuuu]

Writers write, even if no one pays attention. Even if mediocre and downright terrible stories *cough*50ShadesofGrey*cough* receive mind-numbing accolades. This is an uphill battle, plowing through resentment, bitterness, and insecurity, but if you can hang in there hit a sweet spot where you stop giving a fuck and WRITE, the satisfaction is pretty incredible.

At least that's what my experience has been.

[killertofuuu]

I could have written this secret verbatim when I was a lot younger. I couldn't stand how hard I'd work to write a great fic, only to get looked over again, and again, and again. Eventually I'd gotten discouraged and the magic completely disappeared. I took a break from writing that lasted about 2-3 years, and have picked it back up this year.

I don't know what it is that you need to jump this hurdle, or if it's even something worth overcoming. If writing itself means something to you, I hope you can work through these feelings and find honest joy and satisfaction in what you do. Good luck, OP.

[mishey22]

Hi, OP. I know you said that you don't feel like you can bring yourself to write without knowing that you will get lots of praise, but you have to write to build up readers to get praise.

I think my writing is pretty decent, but until I anonymously wrote a popular ship for an exchange I didn't get >10%, but then, when reveals came and people saw it was me, they read some of my other stuff and it bumped me up.

Writing isn't easy, especially in this new age of people not wanting to leave kudos or comment because of whatever reasons they give, but I like doing it so I do.

I've lost my train of the advice I was giving you, here, but are you certain that you actually like writing? Because to write, you have to like to do so.

/ramble