[ SECRET POST #4077 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4077 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Travelers]


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03.
[Joel Kinnaman in Altered Carbon]


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04.
(Black Mirror/IT Crowd)


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05.
[Tessa Virtue & Scott Moir]


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06.
[Little House on the Prairie]


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07.
[Guardians of the Galaxy 2]












Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 44 secrets from Secret Submission Post #584.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[thewakokid]

I'm really hungry, but my girlfriend wont go and make me food. So I'm forced to ask: What is the point of women?

[thewakokid]

I mean, I tried showing her this video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VQ3Xdb-wvBs

But it's like none of it took. I don't get it.

[greghousesgf]

just watched that video. holy shit, is that woman fucked in the head.

[thewakokid]

I dunno, she seems lucid at least.

I had a great time watching this video with my girlfriend. He face, man, it was priceless!

Something like this:

[(Anonymous)]

Get it yourself, bitchbeard.

[thewakokid]

But I hunger! Don't you want to provide value to me again?

[(Anonymous)]

No.

[raspberryrain]

This is funnier if I imagine you with troll-doll hair. Possibly also naked and sexless.

ETA: No, not sexless, the exposed and contracted penis completes the look. :D

[(Anonymous)]

Why would you even want someone who had to be coerced making your food? That ends with that scene from The Help. Get something delivered and tip well and then someone will be happy to feed you.

[thewakokid]

I'll be honest, it's mostly a power move.

[tabaqui]

Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooring.

[thewakokid]

Well, you say that, but you aren't aware of all the facts.

Namely that I found it hilarious. But seriously, click the link above. It's fucking insane!

[(Anonymous)]

Is that chick serious?

[el_regrs]

Well, I'm pretty sure one ensured your existence.

[thewakokid]

Yeah, but I'm here now, they can't keep resting on their laurels. Sure, 30 odd years ago a woman blessed he world with me, and everyone rejoiced... but what have they done for the world recently?

[(Anonymous)]

straight boys these days are such fragile special snowflakes, my grandfather survived the depression, a world war, a career of 30 years, three children, and still cooked a meal a day and could mend his own clothes.

[thewakokid]

straight boys these days

my grandfather survived a world war

I got bad news for you sugar, you granddaddy wasn't that straight. Why do you think they are called foxholes? The weren't. it was called a fucks hole, but fucks holes sounds a lot like fox hole when you have your superior officers knob in your mouth.

[(Anonymous)]

i'm aware you're trolling but honestly this just makes you look even more sad and pathetic, you can't get your own food?

lmao you child.

actually that's insulting to children, i know plenty who can make themselves food.

[(Anonymous)]

Don't feed it, bb.

[thewakokid]

But I want to be fed. that's the entire point of this thread!

[greghousesgf]

yeah, really, even a little kid can make a fucking peanut butter sandwich.

[thewakokid]

Of course I can make myself something. It's the principal. Why should I have to? She's right there, being willful!

I mean it'd be like having a dog and barking yourself.

[thewakokid]

If I can break character for a bit, I'd like to make a distinction: I do not consider this trolling because there is no conceivable way that way of this could be seen as me making a legitimate attempt to trick people into believing that this is my genuine opinion.

I mean, it's a little too obvious to be a legitimate trolling attempt, don't you think?

I personally count this as a dumb joke.

[(Anonymous)]

To starve you until you gnaw off your own arm out of desperation.

It's a long game.

[thewakokid]

That can only go bad for her, tho. Her arm is just as accessible, and since I don't count women as people, it wouldn't even be cannibalism.