[ SECRET POST #4133 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4133 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 45 secrets from Secret Submission Post #592.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

Ayrt - it's not so much that I'm worried about getting into a discussion it's more like: when I say thank you, does a period seem to brusk? An exclamation point too needy? No punctuation will make it seem like I'm a bad writer. Should I say "thank you" or "thank you very much"? What if someone comments on a fic of mine from 3 years ago and then a new fic? I can't reply to the comment on the new one without also responding to the old one but if I reply to the old one what about the three year old comments on that fic I never responded to? Responding to them 3 years later would just attract attention to the fact I didn't respond initially when they've probably just forgotten - etc etc etc. All that runs in my head on repeat when I get comments and I just end up not responding. :(

[(Anonymous)]

DA

I have these same fears. I've started to try and ignore them. No matter how carefully you word what you say there's always the possibility that someone will interpret it in the worst possible way.

Just keep it simple and friendly. Respond to the old comments saying "sorry for the late reply, but thank you so much for commenting!" or something so you can move on and get into your new habit of replying to comments, if it's that important to you to reply.

But at the end of the day it is not the end of the world either way. Some readers might think poorly of you if you don't reply, but others may think poorly of you if you do. Do what feels right to you. If you think that replying to comments is the right thing to do, then go back and leave your belated replies and start replying to all new comments, and don't worry about whether or not people are dissecting your comment, because they aren't, and if they are then they're the weird one. But if you're just doing it out of fear others will think you're rude and you yourself don't find it rude when others don't comment, why worry about it?

[(Anonymous)]

Yeah but above in this thread are a ton of people dissecting how authors reply, who they reply to, and saying if you don't reply you're an asshole who doesn't deserve the comments. It's hard to feel like it really doesn't matter when people get so mad about it :(

[(Anonymous)]

That's their problem, not yours. People also dissect what authors write, where they post it, how they tag it, what subject they chose to write about, how they maintain their blogs, how enthusiastic they are, how ironic they try to be, what they choose as their profile picture, the name they chose for their account, etc. It doesn't mean that you need to worry about pleasing all of them, because you literally cannot avoid nitpickers. If people want to get mad, they will find a reason to get mad no matter what you do; effectively, it doesn't matter what you do, because you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. As long as you're not trying to upset anyone, it's best to just do what your gut tells you is the polite and kind thing to do.

[killertofuuu]

I know, and for the longest time people like that got to me, too. I know it's easier said than done not to let their negativity get you down, but I promise you their egotistical bullshit doesn't matter. There are no rules in fandom and they have no business trying to establish any. They can have their opinions, but that doesn't make them smarter, or morally superior than anyone else. Also, you can't please everybody. It's impossible, and it's ok to stop trying to. I wish there was anything I could say to help, but all I can really offer is my viewpoint and my honest hope that, in time, anyone posting fic on AO3 feeling anxiety about whether or not to comment finds peace in any decisions they make.