[ SECRET POST #4134 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4134 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 38 secrets from Secret Submission Post #592.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

01. https://i.imgur.com/CYjymZP.png

[(Anonymous)]

I'm willing to bet its the writing. When a story focuses on friendships you see more of each character as an individual. Which you can then imagine fitting together in the ways you prefer because lots of various dynamics are possible.

When the drama and plot is all about romance, you see more of the characters as a pairing and less as individuals, all the ship dynamics are already set, and it's like or or leave it. Even if you ship the same thing, you may not ship it the same way as the show

[(Anonymous)]

... this actually explains so much about why I just can't ship the canon pairing in one of my fandoms and why I prefer to ship the main character with his best friend instead. I COULD theoretically ship the canon pairing with enough development, but I don't like the way canon made it happen and because of that I just can't ship it. I prefer the best friend ship because their interactions aren't focused on making a ship happen, they're just interacting naturally and because of that their chemistry feels a lot more genuine.

[(Anonymous)]

This is one of the reasons why I try to steer clear from canon ships and always go for the friendships. The characterization is better when they're individuals.

The other reason is I despise the entitelment from the fans when their ship becomes/is canon.

[(Anonymous)]

True. Another reason could be that the love interest is often presented as an idealized prize, whereas a friend is presented as an actual person.

[(Anonymous)]

This. I'm similar to the OP and this is exactly why. There's more character development when they're friends, and it makes it easier to imagine them working as a couple. When it's set up as a romance from the start, there's less focus on them as individuals.

[(Anonymous)]

This makes sense! I think that's very true in the case of all the m/f pairings I've liked in my favorite shows, for sure.

I like m/f pairings that start off as friendships, so I can relate to the OP's issue some. I think that's a large part of why I'm not so fussed over whether or not they become canon. If they do, then hey, awesome, but if they don't, I've got their friendship on the show to watch and enjoy, so I'm still getting what I want out of canon :D.

[(Anonymous)]

if they don't, I've got their friendship on the show to watch and enjoy, so I'm still getting what I want out of canon :D.

Same. Most of mine have almost no chance of becoming canon, but of the ones that I do, I'd almost rather they didn't because in most cases I don't trust the writers not to ruin everything I loved about their relationship in the first place.

[(Anonymous)]

I think it's more likely that you... don't actually want platonic male/female friendships as much as you think you do

[(Anonymous)]

Same

But it's trendy to say you want platonic male/female friendships.

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think something that loads of people have been constantly asking for for at least 20 years* "trendy."

*20 years being the timespan I've been in fandom, so I can't say for certain that people were asking for platonic male-female friendships prior to that as I wasn't there to see it. But I digress.

[(Anonymous)]

Maybe they're more invested in specific romantic male/female relationships reverting to platonic relationships than they are in general/any platonic male/female friendships?

[(Anonymous)]

Funnily enough I wish for more platonic male/female friendships just so I can ship them, because it's been proven time and again that as soon as a ship becomes canon I'll lose all interest.

[(Anonymous)]

The heart wants what the heart wants, OP. You do you! ;)

[(Anonymous)]

Couples that are friends first are my favorite kind of couple so I get shipping it.

It also doesn't help that in visual media, the actors have to have chemistry for even friendship so it's so easy to turn that into a romantic relationship.

[mrs_don_draper]

I 80000% feel this.

[(Anonymous)]

More than half the time when I see a canon m/f couple I want them to be just friends, and when I see a m/f friendship I want them to get together. I swear, my brain just wants to make my life difficult.

[(Anonymous)]

+1

How a canon couple gets together makes a big difference whether or not I will ship them, as does how the relationship is actually presented. Certain tropes are a hard DNW for me, and they show up a lot with canon het.

[(Anonymous)]

Shipping something doesn't have to mean you want it to be canon. Some of my M/F ships are like that. I'm grateful that they're strictly platonic friendships in canon and still love to explore them as romantic ships in fandom. But if those ships actually became canon, I'd be disappointed.

[(Anonymous)]

Definitely the quality of the writing-- whenever a man and a woman have a close non-romantic relationship, if that's the primary relationship, that's what I end up shipping, but I'm forever complaining about the lack of male-female friendships or deriding m/f relationships in non-romance films as unnecessary and gross... and I think it's because when the writers are writing a friendship/working partnership, they have to actually write about why these characters like and trust each other, and that's what I want in a romantic relationship. Whereas het screen romances are always just about sexual combustability and it's a turn-off to me.