fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4155 ]

[ SECRET POST #4155 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4155 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 40 secrets from Secret Submission Post #595.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Generally, people who believe they have value don't come up with plans to kill themselves, unless they have some irreversible disease or inoperable cancer.

Maybe I'm making the wrong assumption, but it doesn't sound like either one of these. Are you just physically stuck somewhere and don't know who to reach out to?

I don't have anything irreversible.

I've reached out to people. No one will get me out of what I'm stuck in.

There isn't anything worth living for.
I'm older, long-term unemployed and stuck on Public Assistance (and don't want a job). The relative I live with (that is also my landlord) is ready to evict me and render me homeless the minute I either leave Public Assistance or get removed from it for not complying. My siblings don't want me living with them. People/relatives think my face is ugly...which also hinders anyone hiring me. (I Just found out that relatives have been making fun of me behind my back for years.) It also prevents me from getting married to get the hell out of my situation. My mother's second husband mutters that I am ugly and my own biological mother responds with "No YOU can't call her ugly, only I can call her ugly because I'm her mother!" The last two "friends" I have can either provide me with an office job or a place to live but won't do so. In fact, one of them ignores my emails. The only time he seems to voluntarily email me is when one of his ugly male friends bugs him about how he can't get a date- and then my friend thinks of me as a possible suitor for that friend. (I always tell him to piss off, I don't want his ugly friend!) I do not have a university degree and have no money to get one. If I somehow go to university I must either sleep in the street or in a homeless shelter because if I want to live here, according to my mother I must have money coming in somehow, either through a job or Public Assistance. My mother cares more about her other two children because "they look like her and are workers like her". She says it's not her fault that I got my father's ugly face and teeth. I need braces and a bunch of plastic surgery and that takes a ton of money that I will never have and my mother also wont help me out with that. My low-cost health insurance definitely wouldn't either. My sister was just diagnosed with cancer but the tumor is low-grade and slow to metasticise (sp?) so it's being surgically removed tomorrow. And to top it all off, we had to put our dog to sleep in January because he was just too feeble and old. So now I am even lonelier than before. The only "friend" that listens to me is an old middle school friend that became a Jehovah's Witness so now I have to deal with her slipping me Bible quotes for comfort!

Now YOU tell me what the fuck I have to live for.

You’re healthy, have a roof over your head and the ability to choose not to work without either of the first two changing. That’s already much more than the majority of the world has. Consider volunteering at an animal shelter or a senior center or something where you can meet some new people and make a positive contribution to the world.

I am physically healthy at this moment, nonny. Point taken.

It sounds like you're surrounded by assholes. But assholes don't represent the whole world, and even if your face supposedly were "ugly," that's not something that would generally turn off a potential employer. (Not caring about one's appearance might, but no one can help what nature gave them.) And I'm willing to wager your mother is lying or at least grossly exaggerating about your facial features. Except for medical deformities and reconstruction procedures following a nasty accident, nobody "needs" plastic surgery and your mom can fuck off with that shit. Honestly, she sounds toxic as hell, and it might do you some good to distance yourself from her... and most of your family, if they really are just as awful. You should probably find some new friends too. Limit your time with the old ones if you don't want to dump them completely.

I'm not going to pretend there's a single, simple answer. Maybe you think you have nothing to live for at present, but sometimes you have to move forward until you find a reason (or two, or three, or fifty). Sometimes, you have to do what you need to do to get there, even if it means getting out of your comfort zone. Nothing in the world is guaranteed, but there's more to life than being treated like crap by those around you.

I'm going to post this link here. I don't know whether or not you've been around, but you might benefit from it anyway:

https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/

No matter what happens, I wish you well, nonny.

Will check out the link you provided.

Thank you.

The OP here.

My mom didn't suggest I needed plastic surgery. I DO need it. An orthodontist recommended a maxillofacial surgeon when I was about ten years of age. Not going to get into it because it's a LONG story. SO long that I've already typed out and erased what I've written three times, so you will have to trust me on this issue.

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