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Case ([personal profile] case) wrote in [community profile] fandomsecrets2018-09-25 07:34 pm
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[ SECRET POST #4283 ]


⌈ Secret Post #4283 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 21 secrets from Secret Submission Post #613.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
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Transcript by OP

[personal profile] fscom 2018-09-25 11:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I was excited to watch The Fosters at first. I'm a bisexual woman, and it was nice to see a "normal" lesbian couple, where the family was just treated as a family, and not an issue or something to be remarked upon. The show wasn't perfect over the first couple of seasons, but I liked it.

But then came the Jude/Connor relationship.

Jude didn't like being labeled as gay, and I thought that was realistic for a younger teen boy who was still figuring things out. And the show had Connor accepting of that at first, saying he didn't care if Jude was gay or not. But then they had a whole episode that seemed to be about labels. And when Jude refused to label himself, a side character says that because he didn't identify as gay, he would only break Connor's heart. So with that, Connor pressures Jude until Jude says he is gay and "super gay" for Connor, which makes Connor happy.

And that pisses me off. It seems to be playing to the stereotype that unless someone is gay, they won't be faithful in a gay relationship. Why couldn't Jude have decided he was bi? Or something else? And why would a label other than gay mean that he wouldn't be faithful and would end up breaking Connor's heart?

For a supposedly inclusive show, I found that awful and it still annoys me.

Re: Transcript by OP

(Anonymous) 2018-09-26 02:51 am (UTC)(link)
that's really shitty and yet I can totally see a teenage boy being selfish about that.

Re: Transcript by OP

(Anonymous) 2018-09-26 03:10 am (UTC)(link)
OP

I can't say for sure, but I don't think I would have minded if it had just been Connor pushing. But it really seemed like a "very special" episode that was saying everyone needs a label because labels are good and you need to be strong enough to say you are gay to be in a gay relationship. Especially because they had had Connor being cool about Jude not wanting to label himself before that episode. So it seemed more like a universal show opinion, which I couldn't ignore.

(Anonymous) 2018-09-25 11:48 pm (UTC)(link)
I haven't seen this show but IA that would piss me off so much

(Anonymous) 2018-09-25 11:50 pm (UTC)(link)
That's a bummer. Hopefully more clumsiness than anything else - especially the bit about gay vs bi as labels.

(Anonymous) 2018-09-26 01:24 am (UTC)(link)
OP

I guess it could have been clumsiness? It seemed like they were really trying to push the "labels are good, as they bring people together" angle, without allowing for the option of people questioning their label but knowing their feelings. And without thinking about the fact that insisting that only a gay person could love another gay person was erasing bi people.

But as a bi person, it still really annoys me.
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