fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #592 ]

⌈ Secret Post #592 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 13 pages, 322 secrets from Secret Submission Post #085.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 5 6 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 3 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 4 - too big ], [ 1 - repeat ], [ 1 - posted twice ], [ 1 - insanely tl;dr personal attack ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

That's me, bb. Always looking down on people who idolize mental illness, when they have no idea of the seriousness of the comments they are making.

My dear. Given your crack about cutting, I can only conclude that your understanding of mental illness is not great - even if you're a fellow nutter. Time to do your homework, methinks.

And for heaven's sake, fandom, stop stressing out when younger fans do something that makes you cringe. Yes, you were just as naive and immature at that age. We all were. Forgive yourselves, and stop taking it out on other people.

Dear lord, my crack was about people pretending to cut. As I explained below, I had no intention of making fun of mental illness (and reading my comment again I still fail to see that I did so). I also recognise that people who feel the need to indulge in such attention seeking behaviours do have something wrong with them and in some cases need to seek help. If you weren't being so automatically defensive, you would note that my main point was that you don't need to try so hard in your life now, you don't need to make these kind of attempts to find your own identity, because your life will improve.

Oh, no, I didn't say it in the nicest way possible. Dear me. Occasionally illusions need to be broken. I did think that people were able to read though, which was perhaps an error on my part. I thought both tone and content would be taken into account.

Also, lol at you telling fans to stop stressing out. Hey, held any more discussions of race that were "just for white chicks" recently?

Fandom - and the world in general - think self-harm is something that kids "pretend" to "indulge in" to be fashionable and show off. This is a dangerous untruth. Self-harm is a genuine symptom of psychological distress. Most people who self-harm keep it a secret. If someone says they're cutting, IRL or online, they should be taken absolutely seriously - not derided as a whiny trendy emo teen. (If you take them seriously, and they are just faking, hey, no harm done. But if they're not faking, and you laugh at them...)

Hey, held any more discussions of race that were "just for white chicks" recently?

Heh. I know you gossip-suckers neither know nor care what really happened, but just in case anyone does:

Last year, I read a couple of White fangirls' arguments that Doctor Who was showing racism in its handling of Black characters like Martha. I disagreed, and said we should be more worried about Magic Negroes like Solomon. Someone chided me that I shouldn't tell POC what aspects of racism to focus on (I forget who, but it was a good point). Now, I wanted to explain that I was not responding to FOC, but to two White fangirls. Instead, I managed to jam my idiot foot down my throat. Worse, it took me something like a week to pull my shit together and post an apology.

I pissed off a lot of people. It was embarrassing. But I learned something, I apologised, and I've moved on. Now it's your turn to do the same about your humiliating memories of adolescence. Because, from the grand old age of forty, teenagers don't look immature; it's the twentysomethings whining about the teenagers who look like brats.

I'm talking to people who say they want to slice their face open to be like the Joker. They're lying.

I know cutting is real, fill in here everything that I would obviously say and you won't listen to because despite my explanations, you have already decided what my meaning was and what my view is upon mental health, so there is no point in continuing.

And honey, I saw what really happened. I actually don't know why I'm bothering to converse with you, I suppose a silly desire to defend myself against someone who will not in any way be able to back down or actually listen to what I'm saying instead of changing the topic so you can 'cleverly' imply that I think something, when I have indicated no such thing. However, as a general rule, I avoid bullies, people with persecution complexes and over inflated senses of entitlement, oh, and racists (y'know what? I put my foot in it just isn't good enough), so I think we should end this here.

Of course I'm racist. You can't grow up in a society this infected with racism and not catch the germs. And I can be a real klutz sometimes, too. None of which changes the fact that you shouldn't have made that remark about kids pretending to cut themselves.

Now. You're conversing with me because you're feeling upset and panicked at all the negative comments you're getting here. It's understandable that you're being wordily defensive and lashing out (http://atheism.about.com/library/FAQs/skepticism/blfaq_fall_adhominem_index.htm). You don't have to, though. If what you posted is right, then stand by it. If you're not sure, then there's no need to reply at all - just think about it. (Remember, you're anonymous! You don't have to defend yourself! You're safe!.)

I never came close to touching that level of naive and immature, kthx.

Of course you weren't. >:)

In a society as weirdly sexually repressed as ours, it's not a huge surprise that weird bad guys have mighty pull power, not to mention generating plenty of rape fantasies. Nice boys and nice girls Do Not Fuck; so we project our lust and kinks and shame onto naughty boys, even imagining them "forcing" us to do the dirty deed. It's a pattern you see all over fandom (and its source texts); there's a parallel naughty girl trope, too.

(It surprises me that people respond to "I want him to rape me!" secrets with "You can't want to be raped!" I mean, it's brilliant they don't accept the rapist's "she wanted it" excuse, good on 'em. But a rape fantasy is the exact opposite of an actual sexual assault, because the woman is in control of everything that happens at all times. Besides, the chances of actually being raped by an imaginary character or by poor Heath are not all that great.)

'Scuse me, hijacking your comment to think out loud there.

[ SECRET POST #592 ]

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