[ SECRET POST #4308 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4308 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Ian and Mickey from Shameless (US)]


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03.
[Fandom Secrets]


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04.
[severus snape x ron weasley]


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05.
[Keira Knightley]


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06.
[Return of the Obra Dinn]


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07.
[Neil Gaiman, Good Omens]










Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 44 secrets from Secret Submission Post #617.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

DA

Who said it's wrong, though? Whenever this gets brought up, this response is made: it's not WRONG to do things for attention or encouragement.

Sure. It's not.

But if it's not working and it's making you said, maybe it's not the best idea to continue on doing the same thing to try and achieve your goals, if those are what they are.

[(Anonymous)]

sad*

[(Anonymous)]

Asking someone if they're drawing "purely for buttpats" isn't a neutral way to ask whether or not they might be happier trying something else.

[(Anonymous)]

It seems pretty neutral to me.

The question basically boils down to "what's your motivation: to create what you want for yourself, or to create what other people will praise you for?". I seldom see any judgement in the question being asked, but it seems to elicit a lot of knee-jerk "DON'T JUDGE ME FOR WANTING ATTENTION" reactions from people who are motivated by the latter. Possibly says more about their feelings about their motivation than the person suggesting they reflect on it.

[(Anonymous)]

... it's not. Like... how is "buttpats" not condescending?

[(Anonymous)]

No more so than any other word I can think of, TBH. 'Attention' would be the obvious alternative, but I've seen so many overreactions to that word that I'd be afraid of using it if I were making AYRT's point. What word would you choose?

[(Anonymous)]

Look, I don't know if you're trolling, but there's no way that "buttpats" is a NEUTRAL term for "positive feedback". Just look at it, ffs. Using it implies that basic encouragement = being PATTED ON THE BUTT like you're a kid or something.

[(Anonymous)]

No. It's not normal or okay to pat kids' butts. Their heads, perhaps, but not their butts.

[(Anonymous)]

Showed your hand there, troll.

[(Anonymous)]

buttpats is slang in fandom circles for undeserved praise.

maybe not all circles but I'd assume that if you heard the term somewhere you'd know it means meaningless praise and usually is used in context such as "all that bnf's fans just come around and pat her butt if she cries about someone not reblogging her work." it's not positive.

[(Anonymous)]

...it is not, my dude. I honestly don't know if you're being a dick and pretending obliviousness, or if you legit do not know how that shit comes over, but it is not "pretty neutral".

[(Anonymous)]

nayrt, but the boiled-down version you gave reads a lot more neutral (subbing in "...create what other people want" even more so.) "Buttpats" is cutesy and to me sounds like someone affectionately talking to a pet, or an annoyed kid talking to an even younger one.

[(Anonymous)]

Dude... There is a process in sharing your art and/or writing/etc...
Fanfiction, mags, art, community, even posting your opinion to this secret proves the motivation of wanting some kind of reaction... The only difference is that they actually created something- something that took time and effort to make.
If all you felt, you kept to yourself, then good for you... but condemning this person for wanting acknowledgment for something they shared is just a dick move.

If you take the time to publish something you are proud of online; to share with those who have the same interests. It's only natural to want acknowledgment... Not to get it, for whatever reason, would hurt. That's all there is to it.

[(Anonymous)]

DA, wanting acknowledgment is fine and normal. I LOVE NOTES. Makes my day. Truly does. But is not getting enough attention cuts into the fun you're having in fandom, you need to take a step back and evaluate. I am so sick and tired of this entitled attitude that has cropped up in fandom.

"I post my stuff and I'm not getting enough attention," person A starts.
"Well," person B says, "If you're just doing it for the attention, maybe you should think about that, because it shouldn't be about attention, right? I should be about fun."
"OMG" the internet shrieks, in all caps, "HOW DARE YOU? They are entitled to feeling hurt and wanting attention! How dare you deny their feelings you evil person you!"

Like, put on you big boy panties and get over it. If your art is good, it will get noticed in time. Just keep at it. Reblog other artist, comment on their stuff, participate in fandom.

[(Anonymous)]

Only they didn't say it so kindly. The original reviewer was being purposefully rude, if they phrased it differently then I would agree, but they didn't. Being tired of seeing something isn't an excuse to be an ass to someone voicing a trouble new to them, but apparently a well worked hardship for you.
Like you said, you love notes, so why shouldn't someone think twice when they don't get any.
If you don't agree, just avoid it. There's no need to criticise someone already down on themselves... If it's constructive, then fine, tell them it's better to draw for yourself than the amusement of other people. Don't mock them in all caps, add 'buttpats' into the mix, just don't be an ass. It's not that hard, and if you can't do it, then don't say anything at all.