[ SECRET POST #4323 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4323 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.



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02.
[Iron Fist, season two]


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03.
[Venom]


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04.
[Dragonsphere]


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05.
[The Captive Prince series by C.S. Pacat]


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06.
[Sarah Michelle Gellar]










Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 31 secrets from Secret Submission Post #619.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

In a shared living situation how do you make someone pull their weight without nagging them?
I have tried sitting down and talking it out. I let them pick what things they would be responsible for. I have tried making a calendar, checklist, and sticking reminder post its up.

IT AIN'T WORKING.

Help me not kill a bitch.

And no, I can't move. I'm 100% stuck.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

Can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. At a certain point, it's a lost cause.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

I would rather live with a horse at this point.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

My advice is, focus exclusively and ruthlessly on what work you need to do to have and maintain a space cleared out that you, personally, can live in - a space that's up to your standards.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

When someone is this much of a lazy asshat, there's no nice, non-confrontational way to make them not be a lazy asshat. It's a shame your roommate has reached adulthood without learning how to do basic household stuff. Obviously I'd plan how to move out ASAP in the future, but for now, try to separate your stuff from theirs as much as possible.

Some people only respond to primitive carrot vs. the stick. If you're doing anything nice for them that makes their life easier... stop doing it. Don't share tasty food. Don't run errands for them. Clean your stuff, leave theirs dirty and if you can remove it from common spaces and put it in their room or outside their door.

But honestly, I don't think you can avoid having a come-to-Jesus talk with this person. Figure out what kind of negative repercussion they might respond to and use that as leverage.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

I have nothing to use against them. The come to jesus talk has been had, I'm just done. At this point I pretty much live in my room because I have no right to keep them out of the shared space but I refuse to clean what is 100% their mess.

It just blows my mind that someone who can go to work like an adult human can come home and behave like a goddamn cave troll.

aaaaaaaaaaaaah.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

Some people just don't care about having a clean house. I'm one of those people. I always chose to not have roommates, and I made sure to marry a guy who likewise didn't care.

You won't change this person. You can only lower your expectations and try better screening next time.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

My expectations are pretty low. I don't care what they do in their own space, I'd just like to stop having cockroaches in mine.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

This is probably really atrocious advice that you should never follow, but the first thing that sprung to my mind was: leave their mess in a pile on their bed. Also, get a lock for your bedroom door so they can't leave shit on your bed in retaliation.

I mean, probably don't do this, because it could descend into domestic warfare pretty fast. But you could at least imagine doing it whenever they're pissing you off.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

I already have a room lock. They're the type to stop by and chat for hours.

Re: Advice

[(Anonymous)]

Not gonna lie, I did that to my first year roommate in college. After about halfway through the year when I finally snapped because she would leave dishes everywhere, even when she went home for the weekend, knowing I'd do them because I loathe a dirty kitchen.

I just dumped everything on her bed and shut the door.