fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4342 ]

[ SECRET POST #4342 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4342 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

__________________________________________________

02.

__________________________________________________

03. [SPOILERS for Daredevil season 3]

[Wilson Fisk/Vanessa Mariana]

__________________________________________________

04. [SPOILERS for Daredevil season 3]

__________________________________________________

05. [SPOILERS for Shameless (US)]

__________________________________________________

06. [SPOILERS for Doctor Who season 11, episode 3 - "Rosa"]

__________________________________________________

07. [SPOILERS for House of Cards]

[Robin Wright as Claire Underwood]

__________________________________________________

08. [WARNING for discussion of non-con]

[Die Hard]

__________________________________________________

09. [WARNING for discussion of child/spousal abuse]

[My Hero Academia]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #621.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So at first it was going to be like this:

A and B have been close friends for a long time and develop feelings for each other. A is in a serious relationship and B is married with kids and there's never been an affair or anything, but they've both acknowledged how they feel. A thinks that maybe someday B will get divorced and they could give a relationship a chance, but something happens that makes A realize B is not going to get divorced anytime soon and maybe not ever, so A decides to propose to their SO, C.

Right before the wedding A and B have an emotional moment where they both accept the way things are and B wishes A happiness with C. A gets married and that's that. Then, a few days later, while A is on their honeymoon, something happens that makes B realize that they made a huge mistake and should've left their spouse to be with A but it's too late now. And depressing though it is, that's the end.

Then she decides that that's too sad, and that shouldn't be the end: all the stuff above happens, and while on the honeymoon, C dies mysteriously. At first some shadowy people attempt to frame A for murder, but they are incompetent and it falls apart, so the official story becomes that it was an accident. Except it turns out that C was killed because of A's job with an organization that opposes the government. And B works for this organization as well, they end up exposing the conspiracy and taking down the bad guys, B gets divorced, and they live happily ever after.

I feel like the first one is better because it's less predictable and I'm also okay with sad stuff, but that's just me. Maybe I'm wrong though, so I told her I would ask some people and see what they think. So...what do you guys think?

I'd say the first one as well. The second one is way too Deus Ex Machina. Unless it's supposed to be primarily a mystery/suspense story where secret anti-government organization mumbo jumbo would actually make sense as a major part of the plot. But if it's mainly a romance about the characters' relationship and the murder stuff is just there as a way to get A and B together, nope. Go with the original idea.

She's talked about doing a government conspiracy type thriller thing before so maybe, but yeah, I don't think it works very well if the only reason for it is to get the characters together.

I agree with the other Anon that the second would only be good if the story is mostly the anti-government intrigue plot and the romance was secondary.

If the first one is just too sad, your friend could re-enforce that while A and B have feelings for each other, A also loves C and B loves his/her spouse, so it's not like they're just settling for people they don't love and can't be happy without being together, and also that their friendship still brings them joy as it us.

She's talked about writing a conspiracy thriller type story before so maybe that could work if the romance was just in the background.

re-enforce that while A and B have feelings for each other, A also loves C and B loves his/her spouse, so it's not like they're just settling for people they don't love and can't be happy without being together, and also that their friendship still brings them joy as it us.

Yeah, I think that could actually be interesting and maybe something a little different than you usually see.

*sigh* Honestly, I just don't like plots like this at all.

I find it difficult to sympathize with characters like A and B who create their own problems by not moving the fuck on when their crush is in a relationship. I particularly dislike it when characters like A know full well they're pining over B and haven't really moved on, but they still do something stupid and unfair to characters like C who don't deserve to be stuck with a partner who doesn't really love them enough to commit fully and is just using them as a fallback plan.

I guess plot #1 is more realistic but depressing. Plot #2 sounds pretty silly unless there's a really good, logical set up for those "shadowy people"... but I bet there isn't, because this doesn't sound like a plot that's well planned with depth and complexity. It sounds like a plot that's an excuse to get two characters together, even if it's by highly implausible means. The fact that there's a mysterious and convenient death is a pretty flimsy, transparent plot device.

I'd also bet that there's no particularly compelling reason for B to get a divorce when they didn't feel like doing so in the first place. I bet it's happening because the author needs it to happen in order to achieve a happy ending. I'm sorry to sound so pessimistic about this, but this is one of the reasons why romance plots annoy me. So many authors are so keen on getting two people together that plot and good writing is a low priority because they don't want to do the work to make it credible.

IA with the other anons who said it MIGHT work if there plot has a heavy focus on the thriller/anti-government plot to the point where it's an actual story that makes sense, and the romance is a sub plot.

I get what you mean, part of me feels like no matter how it's handled it's just going to come across like C and B's spouse are just consolation prizes and that's not exactly a way to make your main couple likable or make people root for them.

She's mentioned the idea of wanting to do a conspiracy thriller type plot someday so maybe I'll try to convince her to go that route and keep the romance in the background. For the most part I think the non-romantic stuff she writes is usually better anyway.

I'd rather read the first story. I love angst when I'm in the mood for it, and frankly, the second version sounds way too convoluted.

I feel like the first would be better and a little less generic but the more I think about it, and reading the responses here, romance is not her strength so I think I'm going to try to convince her to keep the romance to a minimum and focus more on the mystery aspect.

If I'm being completely honest, neither. It's incredibly generic, to the point of being cliche. That is a story that's been told fifty billion times.

Yeah, that seems to be the consensus here. I'm going to suggest going the mystery route since she's mentioned being interested in that kind of thing in the past, and maybe tweaking the plot a bit so it's not so cliche (or maybe I'm just not describing it right, IDK).

The problem is that the first plot sounds like a bunch of tired, improbable romantic cliches about the kind of people you read about on r/relationships and the second sounds far too implausible the way you've described it. The writing would have to be really, really good to save this and... well, usually people who can write that well can also come up with more creative plots. Sorry.

On the one hand I would rather read the first because I sometimes like sad stuff but it definitely has its issues and the more I think about it, the romancey stuff is the weakest of what she's written in the past. I think I'm going to suggest the second but to focus more on the mystery aspect and way less on the romance. I think that could maybe work...I might not be doing a great job of describing it though.

Option C: A likes B, but B has moved on and is 100% happy with their spouse and kids and no longer has those kinds of feelings for A. A realizes they're being a douche to C, breaks up with them and moves on, realizing the whatever feelings for B existed need to be dealt with. Eventually, A finds someone and connects with them far more than they did with B who was clearly infatuation. B is happy with their spouse, live happily ever like that. Ending is ten years later, with them all meeting up and being friends while their kids play together. The fucking end. No love triangles, everything gets fucking resolved, everyone's happy and we get rid of the trite cliches of love triangles.

I'd much rather read the second scenario, but neither sounds very good. The second scenario sounds pretty contrived, but I can handle contrived, to some extent. Whereas I really can't stand the whole melancholy "Two ships passing in the night; we love each other but we just never got the timing right, oh well, I guess it will never be" shtick. It makes me ragey. If the story has got me to ship a pairing and has told me they're in love, I want them to jump whatever hurdles sit between them and get together, damn it.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #4342 ]

What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)

Re: What would you rather read? (Friend needs feedback on story)