[ SECRET POST #615 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #615 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Early cause I have class!

STILL RANK 35 → [ pop ind sec env com ]

Secrets Left to Post: 04 pages, 94 secrets from Secret Submission Post #088.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 1 2 3 - broken links ], [ 1 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 1 2 3 - too big ], [ 1 2 - repeat ], [ 1 2 3 - troll ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

You're not human, are you?

There are not words to describe how absolutely disgusting you are.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

♥

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

Don't even bother, it's not worth the effort.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

Perhaps that anon poster didn't phrase it well, but on some level I agree. My taste in porn has absolutely nothing to do with her trauma. I'm sorry she went through that, but I am certainly not going to change what gets me off because of it.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

I don't think the secret maker wants you to change your taste in porn, though she does seem upset about people not understanding it is.. unsensitive? I have to admit, the part where she says 'exeperiencing it first hand might teach' DOES look like she wants you to change idea.

Re: Not the OP

[beandelphiki.livejournal.com]

And what on earth has given her the idea that people don't understand that, "real rape is BAD?" Really now. I think most people grasp this concept.

Not everyone who's been sexually abused or assaulted is VANILLA. TRUFAX.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

I think most people grasp this concept.

You sure have a funny way of showing it.

Re: Not the OP

[beandelphiki.livejournal.com]

*eyerolls* I've been molested. It was BAD. Happy? So sorry my bluntness offends you. Except, wait! I'm not really. Because yes, I actually DO think most people know that rape is bad, regardless of their kinks. Repeat after me: my kink is okay. YOUR kink is okay.

Kinks do not depend on reality. They often have no relation to reality whatsoever. The sooner the OP actually internalizes this, the happier she'll be. She doesn't have to, of course, but I'd recommend trying.

I have sympathy, but only so far. I'm very sorry she was raped, but I'm equally as concerned about sexual freedom as I am about sensitivity to rape victims. And so long as people are putting warnings on their stories, I see no need for moral outrage. That's not even so much about the OP's secret (which, as has been hammered on, is just a common emotional reaction) so much as the people replying who seem relieved that she "called out" non-con.

Er, no, not getting behind that.

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

And what on earth has given her the idea that people don't understand that, "real rape is BAD?"

It's not an idea, it's an emotional reaction.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

different anon.

so? I'm sorry she went through her trauma. it's a horrible thing to have happen to someone.

but our fantasies are not her reality. HER emotions have nothing to do with, nor should they influence, what turns ME on. she needs to get out of my bedroom.

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

She's not in your bedroom, she's not telling you waht to do, she's just reacting to what you do. There's a difference, and if you'd stop being incredibly defensive for like three seconds you might be able to see that being upset by something is not the same as believing that it shouldn't be allowed.

Re: Not the OP

[cazrolime.livejournal.com]

*raises hand* Living proof. Molested; reads noncon and bloodplay and all that.

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

And I don't expect you, or anyone else, to change. And I don't HONESTLY think that anyone should experience it firsthand to teach them some sensitivity, that's just a kneejerk reaction that I can't always control.

However, I do not think that I'm being unreasonable to wish that my friends, who are aware of what happened to me, would not talk to me about something that they know is upsetting to me. Or to wish that when I do say to them "Hey, could we not talk about that? It makes me uncomfortable," that they wouldn't completely flip their shit and call ME insensitive.

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

They call you insensitive? That's really bogus. I'm sorry you have to deal with that. Do you think they just might be getting defensive because they feel guilty about it?

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

That's kinda what I figure. And yeah, actually, I DO think that since I've been through it and they haven't, they should show a little extra consideration and NOT rub my face in their perversions. (especially since god knows I would never call them perverts to their faces)

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

I think it's one of the most common fantasies, actually, so technically not really a perversion, but I get what you're saying. Have you tried talking it through with them?

Re: Not the OP

[(Anonymous)]

Yup. I got called a stuck-up bitch. Like I said, extremely defensive.

Re: Not the OP

[paperclipchains.livejournal.com]

They must be damn good friends for you to put up with that shit.

Re: Not the OP

[sistermagpie.livejournal.com]

Makes sense to me. You don't want anybody to get hurt or go through it, but when you hear people talking about rape fantasies you have that emotional reaction. Not all survivors would have that emotional reaction but you do. I don't think it's asking too much from your friends to be aware of that since it hurts you and you can't control that it hurts you. They can still read, like and write what they want.

Re: Not the OP

[qa.livejournal.com]

It sounds like you have some douchebag friends. That's terrible of them to do that to you.

Re: Not the OP

[cazrolime.livejournal.com]

Sorry, but that's horrible of them. If you have a subject that hurts you and you ask them not to talk about it to you, then they should respect that. It's a kink, for crying out loud; they don't need to be going on about it every waking moment.