[ SECRET POST #4470 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4470 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 02 pages, 33 secrets from Secret Submission Post #640.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

Re: Realizing you have feelings for someone else when you're in a relationship...

[(Anonymous)]

The situation sounds complicated and unfortunate and I don't think anyone was intentionally being an asshole in it. But it's what you've got to work with.

You having feelings for her and not doing anything about them: that's your fault. But you've mentioned you're going to take steps about it and that's going in the right direction.

Her having feelings for you and telling you about them: that's not your fault. It's also not your responsibility to be her lesbian life coach or support her through her divorce or non-divorce because she got attracted to you and told you about it. That's not fair. She's got to work through her own shit then get back to you if she wants to. It sounds like right now she doesn't even know what she wants, which means you can't help her get to it even if you wanted to. You rightly feel stuck in limbo because you are. The person who has to decide what she wants is her, then you decide whether you find that acceptable or not.

How long are you willing to wait?

Re: Realizing you have feelings for someone else when you're in a relationship...

[(Anonymous)]

OP

That's part of what sucks so much. I don't feel like either of us is a bad person, and although everyone in this thread is opening my eyes to the fact that she hasn't exactly handled things in the best way, I honestly don't believe it was her intention to hurt anyone.

Yeah, I'm coming to the conclusion that the best thing to do at this point is to end things with my girlfriend because regardless of where things do or don't go with my coworker, I'm not happy in my current relationship and it's not fair to my girlfriend. Then if my coworker decides to leave her husband, maybe we can see what happens then, but for now I probably need to keep my distance.

Honestly, I don't know. :(