fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4497 ]

[ SECRET POST #4497 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4497 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

01.

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02.

[Chef and food writer Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall, the River Cottage series]

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03.

[The Final Table, Rafa Gil (Brazil) and Esdras Ochoa (Mexico)]

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04.

[James Bond/Moonraker, Jaws and his girlfriend, Dolly]

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05.

[Luther]

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06.

[Queer Eye]

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07.

[Brooklyn 99, Rosa Diaz & Amy Santiago]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 25 secrets from Secret Submission Post #644.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I need to vent and ask for advice; anyone else want to join in?

I’ve worked for the same organization for 15 years, and only promoted twice, but even though it took me forever to get only a step up the ladder, I’ve never been denied the chance to interview.

Last time I interviewed for the same position I currently hold, but full rather than half-time, I asked for feedback when I was told I hadn’t gotten the job. They said they’d get back to me, and never did. It’s standard practice with them to ask for and receive feedback

This time, I asked to interview and was never even told I didn’t qualify; I found out because one of my coworkers is on the interview panel and the interviews are happening all this week.

Should I ask the higher ups why I was denied an interview, or just accept that I’m stuck being underemployed in a job I’d hoped to make my career?

I feel like even asking is going to come across as entitled whining, but I’m genuinely stumped, even my supervisor has no idea why they skipped me.

Now that I’m off work for the day I’ve been crying my whole way home; this month has already sucked for a whole smorgasbord of reasons, and now I’m terrified I’ve wasted half my life on a job that doesn’t really pay enough to live on unless I get full time, promote, or both. I thought it would be worth it to live like a beggar for awhile if it meant moving up, but I can’t do it forever, and I’ve only ever worked for them. I’ve never even interviewed anyplace else.

Duude, you're not stuck. They don't value you, you're underpaid - You don't owe them a damn thing. This is why younger people job hob every 2-3 years, we know employer loyalty is bullshit.

It's capitalism; no one will pay you what you're worth, but you sure do not have to stay there.

AYRT—the organization has slowly been switching to a more corporate “screw our employees” mindset over the years, but I was grandfathered in to the old pension system because of my original hire date. I have great insurance and two months saved paid vacation/sick time since I rarely take time off. On the one hand, the pension is pretty great, on the other hand, I won’t be fully vested for almost another 20 years—it would be much less time to earn out if I were full time.

We don’t pay into Social Security. If I leave before I’m vested, the organization keeps most of what I’ve set aside for retirement—I always assumed eventually I’d be full time/make enough to have outside savings, and if I left now, what I did get would be a lump sum when I quit, not a set amount for however long I lived once I retire.

And unless I quit outright first, I have to get their approval if I want to get a second job. I would guess they’d let me, but not if I’ve done something (what though?) to piss somebody off. I guess I’ll start job hunting for another part time/hourly job, and if they say no to that too I’ll try and figure out a plan to take my ball and go home.

I volunteered with them when I was in high school. I didn’t think I was employable when I landed my entry level job—I’m autistic or some variety of brain damaged and I barely coped with school, and my first year or so at work was rough, but now I know how everything works and I’m comfortable in and enjoy my job. Everybody I know works for them. It forms a big part of my identity, tbh.

I have to get their approval if I want to get a second job.
Everybody I know works for them. .

This sounds.....really weird. These people have that big a hold on your local job market?

AYRT—No, it’s a local government job. I’m assuming if I had an entirely different body type and got a job as a stripper it might make them look bad. Also in the event of an emergency we become temp emergency personnel and have to be available for that.

OH okay that makes more sense. It's terrible how they're treating you

Same anon—and “everybody I know” isn’t that many people; most of my family is dead and I’ve always sucked at making friends, so long-time coworkers are as close as I get. Never had a significant other.

There’s about 700 people scattered around 40ish locations and I’ve worked at maybe half of them and know maybe 100 people, maybe 30 people well enough that we catch up whenever we run into each other. A lot of the people I knew from when I started have retired, or retired and passed away.

Families and spouses work scattered across the locations because they’re not allowed to supervise each other. I went to the memorial service for an ex boss, held at the location he’d supervised, ten years after he’d retired. All his old employees showed up. Members of the public who remembered him showed up. It’s kind of insular, but the organization by no means have the job market cornered here; there’s several million people and thousands of employers where I live.

Unless you’re keeping state secrets or want to work for a competing government, they can’t prevent you from job hunting. If someone makes you an offer, you tell your current job that you’re quitting unless they promote you and give you a clear path forward.

Talking to someone in your HR department about your career trajectory and how to get it where you want it wouldn’t hurt.

Start looking for a new job. They don't respect or value you, you should not respect them.

That sucks. That really, really sucks and I'm sorry, anon.

You're totally within your rights to ask, but you should also probably start looking seriously at what your options are outside of this organization if they're going to do this shit to you.

I hate my job and I want to quit but I feel like there's literally no other job that will take me. This job is boring. It's creatively stifling. It's depressing. There's no room to move up and I don't really want to anyway because I fucking hate the company. I cry every morning and just fantasize about throwing down my name badge and walking out. And I can't up and quit because my partner may be losing their job soon and is similarly depressed. Mostly venting but advice is welcome too because I feel like I've dug myself into a pit.

What makes you feel like there's no other job that would take you?

Not a lot of opportunity where I live. I'm basically already at the best paying shitty job around that people go to when they're desperate (and it's not much). Plus I majored in something stupid and I don't know people so "networking" is a foreign language to me.

this is just a vent, not asking for advice. One of my neighbors stole an amazon package my friend sent me. I have no idea which one of them did this. I'm really pissed.

fuckers!!!

Does anyone remember when you could buy lamps that weren't really fuck off bright? That was a good time.

I've been looking for some for ages but everything is blinding LEDs or those giant expensive retro bulbs that I can't afford to keep replacing.

Have you tried a better lampshade?

Expensive, but...

https://www.amazon.com/TaoTronics-Eye-caring-Dimmable-Brightness-Licensing/dp/B00VUTAFR8/

You can adjust the softness/brightness as well as different dimming settings.

My friend will not. Shut. The fuck. Up. About Endgame. I'm not into MCU at all, and normally this is just fine in our friendship; we have other things in common! But she's super mad about this movie, and literally every single conversation we're having has to come back to it. And I just... I don't care! I don't care about any of it.

I've flat-out told her that I feel like she hardly wants to talk to me at all unless it's about a movie I'll never see, and she said she saw my point and she apologized, but she just. Keeps doing it. I'm at my wits end! I'm hoping this just cools off in the next couple of weeks, I know the wound's still kind of fresh, but like... this feels unhealthy? Something I hate just happened in one of my fandoms too, but it hasn't consumed my entire soul like it seems to have for her. I want to tell her to take a couple hundred steps back, because there's no reason to be this personally invested, but idk.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ SECRET POST #4497 ]

Venting/advice thread.

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