fandomsecrets | [ SECRET POST #4508 ]

⌈ Secret Post #4508 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

Everything below is spoilers.

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01. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

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02. [SPOILERS for Game of Thrones]

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03. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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04. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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05. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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06. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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07. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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08. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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09. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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10. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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11. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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12. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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13. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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14. [SPOILERS for Avengers: Endgame]

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15. [SPOILERS for Pokemon (anime)]
[WARNING for terminal illness, fires/burning, and character death (in context)]

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16. [WARNING for Eating Disorders]

[Sailor Moon]

Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #645.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Something happened today that really creeped me out. A man who was, I guess, a "fandom friend" - strictly online - called my work office today. I think we chatted on AIM after meeting on some message board when I was in high school. Possibly junior high school. I haven't spoken to him since and I'm thirty now.

I don't recall telling him my real name. I know he'd seen cosplay pics of me, it's not impossible that he tracked me down. Probably five years ago he tried to add me on Facebook, but I ignored the request - I always had a no-online-friends policy. If he tried to message me on my old LJ, I wouldn't know, I haven't used it in a decade.

Anyway, he called my office today, and my secretary picked up. Apparently he said he was "my friend". I was busy when informed about the call and didn't recall the person's name, so I told my secretary to take a message or have him e-mail me. When he e-mailed, I remembered.

This guy was always a few years older than me, but nice enough at the time. I'm sure he's just a well-meaining socially awkward weirdo or something. In his e-mail, he said he wanted to "reconnect" and said he had a wife and kid now. But I am so, so creeped out by this. And the thought that someone from my mid-teens who undoubtedly has cosplay pics of me is contacting my coworkers... I've felt squeamish since.

Should I respond to his e-mail? Say I don't know him and he's got the wrong person? Bitch him out and tell him to never contact me again?

If you're that creeped out and have no intention of reconnecting, why not just pretend he got the wrong person?

Personally I don't think I'd respond at all, because I'm creeped out by this, too. It's exceedingly WTF-ish that someone you were only online friends with (and not that close to there anyway either) calls your workplace after over a decade, knew your name and where to find you...yeah, that's odd to say the least.

Oh hell no, that's creepy as shit. Don't email them. Or maybe email them and say they got the wrong person?

Okay, you just won the lifetime creep sweepstakes (creepstakes?) and I’m sorry, that’s kind of terrifying. I’d say either don’t respond, or respond with “sorry, you must have the wrong person.”

ayrt I'm still super disturbed but I lol'd at "creepstakes". I knew my moment of luck would come one day..

That's a lot of research to find you. Super creepy.

He obviously knows that he's got the right person, if he found you. Just ignore him or politely tell him that you've moved on with your life and don't wish to return to the past circles. And then ignore him if he contacts you again.

This. Good advice.

All of this.

I got shivers reading that, OP. I'm sorry that happened to you. I'd be creeped out, too.

ayrt

Thanks, that's good advice. My gut was to write an angry reply saying this was inappropriate and telling him to never contact me again.. but what if, by chance, he's a crazy person (the online stalking me or whatever is already not a great sign) and, I don't know, sends my office a bunch of my old cosplay pics or something stupid and embarrassing like that? I thought about saying I don't know him, god forbid he tries to "prove" it. I feel the safest ignoring - also gives me plausible deniability around the office - but hopefully he doesn't try again...

Just because he's married doesn't mean anything. A so-called friend of my mom's recently tried to "reconnect."

They were talking a week before he asked if she wanted to hook up. :/

And it was a similar situation where he clearly went out of his way to track her down since he didn't know her married name.

Assuming he's married at all...

[ SECRET POST #4508 ]

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