Case (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
case) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomsecrets2008-10-10 04:45 pm
case) wrote in fandomsecrets2008-10-10 04:45 pm
[ SECRET POST #644 ]
⌈ Secret Post #644 ⌋
Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.
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Notes:
CITY STUFF → http://lolbuttsex.myminicity.com
Secrets Left to Post: 00 pages, 00 secrets from Secret Submission Post #092.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 1 2 3 4 - not!secrets ], [ 1 2 - not!fandom ], [ 1 - too big ], [ 1 2 - repeat ], [ 1 - personal attack ], [ 1 - doing it wrong ], [ 1 - what ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.
108, 134, 152
The thing is, wanting to look 'more Asian' isn't a far leap from trying to fit all the traditional expectations of being Asian. Lemme tell you from my experience--I tried to fit all of my extended families' expectations and I nearly destroyed myself as a result.
I was bullied about my weight--even though I was never considered fat. I wasn't 'thin enough' in my Aunt's eyes. It didn't even seem to matter that my weight would increase, but after puberty, my clothes' sizes were getting smaller--all she saw was the number on the scale when she made me step on. Another Aunt teased me for being too much like a boy, but I didn't tell her it was because I knew that it was what my dad had really wanted. The only people who placed expectations on me that I didn't mind were my grandparents, who were proud of my intelligence, and told me to teach my little cousins and protect them. But because my father eventually became abusive, and I couldn't speak out against him to my family, I developed an uncontrollable rage that I fought desperately to channel as being protective--but then I was jumping at the chances for fights, even if people so much as laughed at my cousins. It certainly didn't help that my father's tendency for violence ended up making me faster and stronger than most people in my age range and older. =\
Things are ok now--because I eventually said 'fuck this shit'.
Anyhow, tl;dr--be happy with you. It is far more satisfying to be told 'you look confident' rather than 'you look Asian/White/European/etc'.
134 - Ugh...another reminder of my sordid past. I am so glad you are better now--you sound like you've become a real gem of a person. ♥
152 - Oh thank god, a secret that doesn't hit close to home, but...D: