[ SECRET POST #4790 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4790 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 07 secrets from Secret Submission Post #686.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[(Anonymous)]

I mean, they can. But those people might get soundly told to piss off.

[(Anonymous)]

Fucking this. Like think what you want, and criticize the "problematic implications" of people's kinks in your own space if you want to. But when you do it in public, or in someone else's space, I'm going to criticize you in turn, for being a judgy ass who is apparently incapable of grasping the concept of YKINMKATIOK.

[(Anonymous)]

I mean we can go around in circles about this forever, yeah. But I think it's worth pointing out where kinks are based in bad shit, and in this case, it's almost always presented as a very prevalent (mis)characterization rather than just fun kinky shit in its own private space.

[(Anonymous)]

NAYRT - I think there's a difference between saying, "This popular kink may, in part, be rooted in a societal concept of [X] that is problematic." And saying, "I believe it's people's internalized homophobia that makes them find this kink I don't understand hot." The former is an entirely valid analysis about the trope. The latter is an unfounded judgement/criticism of people who, as far as you know, haven't done anything wrong.

[(Anonymous)]

...internalized homophobia IS a problematic societal concept, not a judgement call. "Maybe we should talk about this" isn't an attack.

[(Anonymous)]

But you're not talking about societal internalized homophobia. You're talking about specific people, accusing them of internalized homophobia, and citing a kink they have as your proof that they're homophobic. Sorry, but that's messed up.

Internalized misogyny is also very much a thing, but I'm not in the rape fantasy threads accusing people of internalized misogyny because they like depictions of sex where the woman is a chaste virgin who says no but the man makes her like it.

Because "What we kink on when we kink on (thing)" is a very complex question with an even more complex web of answers, all of which are incredibly personal and nuanced and specific to the individual. So barging in, going, "Okay, people who like (kink); let's talk about your internalized homophobia!" is so presumptive and over-simplifying as to be rude.

[(Anonymous)]

I'm sorry that's how you read an opinion.

[(Anonymous)]

When an opinion is clearly stated, accusative, and based on nothing? Yup, I tend to read it as accusative and based on nothing, and respond to it as such.

[(Anonymous)]

Dude, "in my opinion, people who like this
like it because of their internalized homophobia," IS, as ayrt said, presumptive af, and definitely over simplifying the issue! That's not ayrt's interpretation, it's what the anon said.

[(Anonymous)]

ty, nonny. :)

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, it's an oversimplification and not a full academic essay on the subject, but "internalized homophobia" is not, in itself, an accusation or supreme judgement call. It's a prevalant societal concept that affects people whether they're aware of it or not, and I'm totally sympathetic about that! It sucks! But jumping to the level of it being a personal attack is just over-reactionary and not helpful to any conversation.

[(Anonymous)]

But there have been discussions in the rape fantasy threads about whether those kinks come from the societal trend of women not being "allowed" to be active participants in sex and thereby using the fantasy as an escape tactic from that misogyny.

When people have internalized a negative trend, I don't think anyone ITT is saying that makes them a horrible person, just that it's a thing that happens in our society. And as someone else said, this is a public discussion forum; we're not going around commenting on people's fic and personal blogs and personally accusing them of anything, just marking what might be a (sympathetic, honestly) explanation for a trend.