[ SECRET POST #4814 ]

[case]

⌈ Secret Post #4814 ⌋

Warning: Some secrets are NOT worksafe and may contain SPOILERS.

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Notes:

Secrets Left to Post: 01 pages, 18 secrets from Secret Submission Post #689.
Secrets Not Posted: [ 0 - broken links ], [ 0 - not!secrets ], [ 0 - not!fandom ], [ 0 - too big ], [ 0 - repeat ].
Current Secret Submissions Post: here.
Suggestions, comments, and concerns should go here.

Comments

[fscom]

06. https://i.imgur.com/umQK8ps.png

[(Anonymous)]

You are hanging out in the wrong areas.

[(Anonymous)]

Can you name any places not like this? Curious.

[tabaqui]

Gotta agree with Anon, there.

[(Anonymous)]

See, I don’t get the nostalgia. I remember the sporking communities and the flame wars and the drama caused by sharing friendslocked posts. And I can’t ever remember a time when 90+ % of trolling wasn’t fucking with people you disliked so you could point and laugh. It’s like hearing from men who think women who dislike being catcalled and groped are a modern aberration and not just (sometimes) allowed to object. It was never harmless fun. The people you targeted can say so now.

[(Anonymous)]

where were you hanging out? bc all i remember from old fandom was how much of a wanky mean-spirited cesspit it was. the language has changed but the behavior is still the same.

[(Anonymous)]

Or you could just ignore what others might think or say and just live your best fandom life as you see fit.

[(Anonymous)]

SA

Also, are you 100% sure that all those "mock quarrels" and friendly trolling was perceived the same way by everyone involved?

Rereading the secret you kinda sound like those bullies who bump into their old victims years later and try to reminisce about the good old days. They always seem to be completely baffled that the other person didn't think of it as ~all in good fun~

[(Anonymous)]

This. I've actually had this conversation with more than one old bully, and every one of those people would have sworn before god that they had never bullied anyone. Being told they drove me to the brink of suicide always really threw them.

[(Anonymous)]

Remembered golden ages tend to be better than lives reality in part precisely because they're remembered and not real.

I am sorry that it has become less pleasant for you and I agree that there are many major flaws with the contemporary internet (which I personally attribute mainly to broader problems in society and bad structural design on the part of social networks).

[(Anonymous)]

Personally, I agree. I never used to feel like I was walking on egg shells. Now I often do.

I also hate how conflict allergic fandom seems to have become. Every time there's the tiniest little bit of discord in my fandom, a bunch of fans freak the fuck out and act like the fandom is being savagely torn apart by evil bullies. It's bizarre. And I feel that way completely regardless of which side I'm on in the conflict, or whether I've even dipped my oar in or not (I usually haven't).

[(Anonymous)]

Sometimes you just gotta use the block button on people who are just going to give you shit. I'm very petty and that's basically what I do on tumblr and my experience on there has gotten better even if I am apparently 'censoring people' by not having to see their dumb opinions lol.

[(Anonymous)]

Speaking as someone who isn’t really an ‘old fan’:
From what I read on Fanlore and such, I get the feeling that fandom has always had its share of drama and discourse.

That said, the walking on eggshells/fear of saying the wrong thing is exactly why I’m trying to leave Tumblr. It’s awful in that regard there.

[(Anonymous)]

Or you could just be a decent person. I’m a bnf who never tempers my words, I just you know. Don’t say shitty stuff that’s going to offend people. There’s a difference. I’ve never once walked on eggshells and I’ve had a lovely fandom experience in huge and small fandoms alike going on 20 years now.

People act like it’s hard. It’s not. Curate your fandom experience if you’re so worried about it.

[(Anonymous)]

I feel you, anon. I lurk more than I used to. It feels like people are always actively pursuing a reason to call people out and pick a fight.

[(Anonymous)]

I dunno, OP. I've been in fandom for a while and there were parts of it that were always nasty, just in different ways. Maybe it feels nastier now because back then things were usually more well moderated and now it's kinda up to the individual to be their own mod.

[(Anonymous)]

I think a big part of why it feels nastier now is because tumblr, as fandom's primary social platform, makes absolutely no distinction between one's own space and public space.

On LJ, I could express my opinion on my journal, and even if it was a legitimately offensive opinion, I was doing it on my journal and only on my journal, so when people replied, they tended to reply accordingly. You don't go into someone's house and tell them off for being a POS, even if they are a POS. Whereas on tumblr, anything you express you are expressing publicly. It feels like your space, to a degree, because you're posting to your blog, and shouldn't your blog be your space? But because of how tumblr works, the answer is overwhelmingly, no. A tumblr blog isn't a journal, it's a podium-and-megaphone.

[(Anonymous)]

I agree. There's always been drama and bullies and wankers, but it was easier to avoid them (unless you had the bad luck to be in a small fandom with one) when everyone's fandoms weren't falling all over each other.

[(Anonymous)]

I was thinking that too. I'm not even a bragging-rights fandom old, but I joined fandom in the days of Harmonians and sporkings and ms.scribe. Whenever this golden age of fandom was, it must have been before 2003.

[(Anonymous)]

I mean, fandom has always been a minefield.

F!S was originally on LiveJournal, and was much more active back in the day. There's always been stuff people in fandom haven't been brave enough to say off anon. And ship wars were more common back then, too. I agree that the current trend of calling people pedophiles for shipping a 27 year old with a 34 year old is shitty, but fandom drama back in the day was shitty too, just a different flavor of it.

[(Anonymous)]

If that would be proven to be true I wouldn’t be surprised. We were force-fed male oriented media since childhood. Female characters were few, ie not relevant.